How I Met Your Father
by SilverThornz
Summary: What can I say? I met him when our world was literally at war…you can imagine what happened next. I didn't think he was especially cute, I thought he was achingly boring, and…well I flirted with his brother. You know, my usual.
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto.

 **How I Met Your Father**

Chapter 1: And it Begins...

* * *

 **This chapter is the set up. Bear with me.**

* * *

The mist shrouded the trees, it was thicker than normal today, but that wasn't saying much for the Mist Village. We practically drank fifteen gallons of the stuff just by walking around town. Hiding in it was just as easy. Staying quiet was practical but not necessarily essential. Most people, even the most skilled ninja had a hard time seeing through the mist.

I could just make out the insurgent down below. The smoke from his little fire wafted upward and left as the wind blew it in our direction. We were nestled in the trees, as all good ninja are trained to do. I could've killed him forty-five minutes ago.

"I'm taking him."

"Absolutely not!" Ichigo hissed, practically spitting on my face. She pointed firmly at him and thrust that same finger at my chest. "Our mission was to gather intelligence, not kill, _gather_."

Ichigo glanced to her left, "Right Chojuro?"

Ichigo was a very pretty girl with dark indigo hair and intelligent eyes. But, much like Chojuro, she was high-strung and desperately needed to lighten up a bit.

I raised an eyebrow at Chojuro and his mouth hung open as he quietly glanced from me to Ichigo, his glasses beginning to fog. Oh, how he hated verbal confrontations. "That's right…" he finally got out. "But—"

"This is taking too long," I said stretching, adjusting my red fingerless gloves. "You can stay up here if you want, but bowl cut and I are about to have a little chat—"

"Rinmaru!" Ichigo fiercely whispered. "You go down there and I'm…" she glanced around, her ultimatum completely and utterly…gone. "I'm—I'm ending the friendship!"

I spun on her, eyes wide, "You wouldn't."

"I would." Her brown eyes matched my green eyes tick for tack. "Try me."

I sucked in a deep breath, took one glance at bowl cut and conceded. "Fine."

She nodded triumphantly, throwing one long indigo braid over her shoulder.

"I'll just tell my aunt you tried to blackmail me…I'm sure she'd love that." I shrugged, turning my attention back to the insurgent. He'd just started brewing ramen in a cup. I stuck my tongue out. I hated ramen in a cup. This guy deserved to die. "Especially the part where you said she couldn't even catch a husband with three-hundred and sixty-five arms. But…whatever…"

"Rinmaru!" Ichigo started silently screaming and pointing at me, but I paid her no mind. "I didn't say that!"

"I'm guessing I have your permission now? Chojuro?" I glanced back at our comrade. He was older than the both of us. I was only seventeen to his nineteen. He also happened to be a complete and utter badass, but…he lacked decisiveness and confidence. Being the Mizukage's niece—a fact she seldom mentions—I usually took charge even when I was ill-suited to do so. Perks of the relationship. "What do you think?"

"If you think Lady Mizukage will accept it." He said finally. "Go on."

"Cool." I winked at him and dived off the branch into chaos.

I landed behind the insurgent, flicked off his mask and said, "Boo!" loudly in his right ear.

He jumped up, but as bored as I was, I wasn't one to drag a fight out. I hit him square in the back of the neck and he went down, crashing right into his newly made ramen. If he'd been aware, I was sure he would've put up a good fight but I liked to think that there was one thing that separated the Mist from other villages. We didn't like to play games. Even after my aunt took over, that fact still range true. To salvage what was left of the village, I think that fact needed to be even more true.

I backed up the enemy's things and threw his pack over my shoulder. There was no point in riffling through them. He'd tell us all we needed to know soon enough. I drew my hand signs and raised my palm toward the empty space in front of me. I clamped my left hand over my right wrist and said, "Open!" the space began to shake and water came from every direction forming a spinning, long oval in the air. Chojuro and Ichigo landed to the right and left of bowl cut and hefted him up. The portal was now fully formed, the other side showed us the Mist Village containment center. "Let's go home."

/

"No way!" I said, leaning across the table, fighting back a huge grin. "The Five Kage Summit? That's insane!"

"It's insane that it's come this," Ao said solemnly, his head bowed. "Back in my day, we wouldn't have even dreamed of meeting like this."

"Well, yeah," I waved him off and turned back to face my unperturbed aunt. She just looked like it was a regular Wednesday to her. "But still…all five. Impressive. I'm just surprised that that Tsuchikage climbed out from under that big rock of his."

"As am I. I'm even more impressed that the Leaf are so willing to meet with the Cloud after what it attempted to do to the Hyuga Clan." The Mizukage said, taking a sip of sake. "These are dark days."

I took this as my cue to grow just as silent as everyone else. I paused briefly, watching as the elders shook their heads or sighed in consternation. After a minute or so I spoke up, "What now?"

My aunt looked up at me from beneath her bangs, "We prepare. You'll be accompanying Ao, Chojuro and I."

"Excellent!" I leaned back into my chair, resting my hands behind my head. "Do we have any data on the ninja the other villages are sending?"

"None, only that the Kage are bringing two guards each…. while we are bringing _three_." Ao said. "Chojuro and I will be her main guard while you will be on standby to move us if something goes wrong."

"In other words…" I surmised, "If war breaks out, we want to be the first to have our ninja ready for battle." Nodding, I gave the group the sly smile they came to expect from me. "I can't wait."

/

Three ninja were ahead of us, and by their dress and the shaking of the one in black, they were from the sand. No other village could have been more ill-prepared. Did the desert even get snow? Have they even seen it?

They seemed to notice our approach and slowed down. Once our little group came to a stop, theirs did too. Aunt Mei stepped forward. Chojuro and Ao flanked her. I was at her back, peeking around the three of them to get a better look at that Kazekage I had heard so much about. Ao stopped me with his hand, I flashed him a sweet smile he knew to be a perfect death threat.

"Hello," came a scratchy voice. It was deep and dry, undoubtedly because it was seldom used. "It's good to meet you, Mizukage."

She stepped forward, and you could see the Kazekage's guards tense up at his sides. "A pleasure, Kazekage." She tilted her head, surveying him, "You _are_ young, aren't you? A shame."

Aunt Mei turned to look at me with a slight smile. "This is Chojuro…Ao. And this, Kazekage, is Lady Rinmaru Terumi Asakura, granddaughter of the feudal Lord in the Land of Water."

"I didn't know spectators were allowed…especially those with such strong chakra." The Kazekage said, but he didn't seem to mind in the slightest. It was that voice of his, it was like he was trying to put himself to sleep. I stepped forward.

"I assure you," Mei started, "She won't even be in the room. I like to keep her close—for protection—you understand. She was visiting us, but I thought it would be irresponsible to leave her in the village without my being there. My enemies could use that vulnerability as a chance to attack."

"Understood." The Kazekage agreed. The group grew quiet and I was instantly bored.

I looked from one face to the other. My eyes jumped over paint-face and the angry blonde, not really caring if they were insulted or not (a trait that ran in the family). Finally, my eyes settled on the little red one between them. My lips twitched, and I closed my eyes trying to keep myself from breaking, but my aunt cut her eyes at me and I immediately collapsed into laughter. "Is this really the Kazekage?" I aimed my next statement right at him, "I really thought you'd be hotter."

The outrage on the blonde's face was matched only by the confusion on the paint faced one. I sighed and decided to play the part of spoiled princess, "Oh, well. Can't win them all." I turned to paint face, "What's your name?"

His looked me over, seeming to come to the conclusion that yes, I was attractive and yes, I was speaking directly to him. Lucky boy.

Paint face looked over at the Kazekage, who also seemed to get over his shock. He nodded. "My name is Kankuro." His voice was scratchy too, but in a different way. A bit more nasal, I think.

"Kankuro," I repeated, testing it out like it was a delicacy, "Can you tell me about the Sand? I've never been."

"Well," he started, scratching his head nervously, trying not to crumble beneath my gaze. "It's practically a desert."

I stared at him a moment before I realized it was a joke. "You're too much!" I giggled, hitting his arm. Behind me, Ao hadn't collected his jaw. The Mizukage, of course, was enjoying the show. "shall we go? I don't want to make you all late."

/

I pegged Kankuro for the strong silent type…but the guy could talk…a lot. By the time we'd reached the destination, I'd stopped trying to get information out of him. I was barely hanging on, forcing myself to laugh at every joke, pretending I needed his help to carry on. I could hear Temari complaining under her breath, but the Kazekage was completely silent—dead silent as if he was in deep concentration. I could tell he was a fun guy. Kill me.

We were greeted at the door and they were lead off to a room. I was pulled aside. "I hope everything works out!" I said cheerily to the group, winking at my own comrades.

Kankuro beamed. Temari shook her head at her brother. What the Kazekage did next stumped me. He'd started forward and then turned around to glance back at me, "Thank you."

"What for?" Flirting with your guard non-stop for ten minutes? Calling you a disappointment?

"Your compliment earlier."

My lips twitched into a frown as I tried to remember. "You're welcome."

I smiled eagerly, ninety-nine percent sure I'd actually insulted him, but I wasn't about to complain. "Be safe, Lord Kazekage."

With a nod, he turned and left. Once out of sight, I broke down into a laugh. What a sad, sad, oblivious panda.


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto.

How I Met Your Father

Chapter 2: Surprise! Surprise!

* * *

Here we go...

* * *

"It's Sasuke Uchiha!"

"Don't let him near the Kage!"

I could hear the hysterical voices even through the thick doors. Licking my lips, I slipped from my place on the couch, and rolled off my kimono, revealing my ninja garb beneath.

They'd set me in a small, windowless room sparsely furnished with a few chairs and a glossy wooden table. I expected better from the Iron Country with their 'iron pride' and all. They did, however, station two samurai outside my doors. How very sweet of them. Insert smile here.

"Stop him!"

"He's already—"

Ooff!

One guard seemed to have bitten the dust. I cracked the door open. "Lady Rinmaru! You must retreat—"

"Take a nap, sir. You need it more than I do." I said grasping my hands together to start the genjutsu. I was borderline bored, I couldn't dream of a better remedy.

/

I followed the noise, hastily sprinting through the corridors. I came upon a great hall held together by large columns. I skidded to a stop beside the Temari, the Kazekage's female guard. I'd walked in on a glorious battle. I looked toward the ceiling, thanking the heavens I was born for this moment.

My eyes followed the young Uchiha in the middle of the room. He wore a beautiful smirk the likes of which made me instantly grin. That look held so much confidence it was palpable—I could practically taste it. I licked my lips. It was dark too, sort of like the candy you're not supposed to have but want anyway. Aunt Mei would probably have a heart attack if she saw him. While I liked to look, she'd much rather touch…and keep…and then marry. Not necessarily in that order.

" _Oh_ ," I said, garnering the attention of those beside me, "No one said he looked that good. Ha! _Even bleeding_ I want to taste him." I started weaving signs. The boy couldn't reach the Mizukage. Sexy face or not, beautiful had to die. Tragic really.

"Is that really your first concern?" Temari said narrowing his eyes at me, shaking off that tiny smile that appeared on her lips.

"Naturally," I responded with a roll of my eyes. "Are you blind Temari? Even messed up the man's basically a god!"

Her serious expression wavered before she narrowed her eyes at Uchiha again. I knew I liked her.

"And shouldn't you be back in your room?" Kankuro seemed to growl, clearly miffed that I'd moved on so fast. I mean…can you blame me? "Back where it's safe?"

"As much as I enjoyed our time together, Dear, you had to know I was faking. I wasn't even trying that hard." I admitted, flexing my brow at Kankuro. "I still think you're cute though. Maybe we could be friends…we'll see."

"Enough," the Kazekage's deep voice, broke through the silliness. It was authoritative, effectively silencing both Kankuro and Temari. The Kazekage started talking to Uchiha like he knew him, tried to 'reason' with him. All Uchiha said was something about the darkness—and that's about the time I tuned out.

"Gaara," Kankuro said finally, urging the Kazekage. "You're the Kazekage, you can't let this get personal." I glanced over at him, his expression was for the most part, a mask but still as his guard spoke to him I saw a single tear slip from his eye. He didn't want this. He was the absolute last person that wanted this. My stomach clenched from one look at him. I couldn't stand it, why was he even the Kazekage? All Kage had to make tough decisions. He needed to suck it up or no one would take him seriously. Hell, at first glance at him I didn't really even respect him. Didn't he get that?

I shook my head, "You're nothing like I thought you'd be," I told the Kazekage, "I expected more from Gaara of the Desert."

The Kazekage's gaze drifted over to my face, seeming to remember I was even there. "Valuing life is not a weakness, no matter how dark it has become."

I blinked at him, my cheeky reply lost in my throat. His eyes returned to Uchiha, an unsettling quiet falling over him. I don't think I've ever hated anyone more than I hated him in that moment.

Despite his hesitance, however, his sand began to move, sealing his resolve. Sue me, but…I started to feel dirty. Don't get me wrong—because I didn't feel guilty—I was absolutely right! But, whatever Uchiha was to him…anyone could tell the guy didn't want to fight. Cursing, I cracked my fingers. I threw up my hand and started waving at Uchiha to get his attention. "Hey! Beautiful! You want to put that sword down and come over here so we can talk this out?"

"Who is this clown?" I heard the Raikage yell.

"She's a civilian I think, she came with the Mizukage." The dark skinned, white haired guard near the Raikage spoke up and I leveled a wink at him. He greeted me with a shrug and a smile. Also cute in this sort of effortless way.

"Well aren't you observant." I said, stepping forward to get a better look at him. "We'll have to talk later. Now you—" I turned my attention back to Uchiha, who was watching me suspiciously. "How about it handsome? Just you and me…no Kage. I can pull a few strings…get you what you want…I can set you up with my aunt…everyone wins."

I weighed my hands back in forth. "But clearly, you're the main winner here. You get to live! How about that?"

"Who are you supposed to be?" Uchiha replied coarsely, he either didn't pick up on my flirting with him or he didn't care, either way I appreciated his pluck. I wasn't vain or anything, but when I flirted with a guy he usually noticed. He usually drooled too or undressed me with his eyes, not necessarily in that order.

"I'm important." I swaggered forward again, ignoring the Sand's complaints behind me. "That's all you need to know." I ignored the Raikage complaining about not knowing who the hell I was.

His gaze narrowed again, but he made no move to drop that sword.

"See, Sasuke—can I call you Sasuke?—you have two options." I held up two fingers, "You can either come quietly or…you and your little group can all die right now. Which is it? And you should choose wisely because, unlike Lord Kazekage over there, I don't know you. Your very existence is a threat to my village. My home. And, I may not look like it, but—like the Raikage— I'd much rather pop off your sexy little head and call it a day. But I'm playing diplomat and thought I'd try talking first. What do you say, beautiful?"

He started to laugh, one of those maniacal laughs you see in the movies. Mouth wide and everything and suddenly his stopped and pointed his sword at me. "Unless you can give me Danzo, we're done talking."

 _That's it?_ "Done." I said and flashed a smile at the Sand, "Who's Danzo?"

Both Temari and Kankuro stared at me opened mouthed. The Kazekage's eyes were slightly widened, apparently he's never seen a successful peace talk before. No one said anything for a moment until that Kazekage spoke, "He's the acting Hokage."

"Ah," I turned back to Uchiha. "Yeah, that can't happen. Sorry, Sasuke. Let's try this again."

Anger flashed in his eyes. Yep, he was done. I lunged forward and threw a kunai knife at the pillar to his left with a paper bomb attached to it. The area exploded, but I'd already set up two portals. Instead of exploding from his left, the scattered depris fell from above, not that it mattered. Uchiha didn't even dodge. That skeleton thing came to his rescue.

I started forward, and he flicked his eye open at me immediately engulfing my body in flames. The clone dispersed and the real me came at his left.

Water Style! I pulled my head back. _Serpent's Venom Jutsu!_

Poison, needle like streaks of water burst from my mouth at high speed. He only stood there, making my attacks look hugely ineffective. "Damn you!" I shouted, "What the hell is that thing?"

The Kazekage attacked, despite his hesitance and Uchiha dodged him. He shot that fire but it was quickly stopped by sand. It went on like a dance before everyone decided a group attack was the best way to handle this guy.

We all gave our best shots but…

"Gaara," Uchiha said, well beyond attractive now. He'd gone and embarrassed me in front of these people. If he didn't die today, so help me! "My defense is even better than yours!"

Uchiha moved. His Susanoo attacked twice.

"He's aiming for the pillars!" someone shouted.

I threw a large portal right above our heads and another towards Uchiha. As the ceiling tumbled down, it fell through the portal and landed right where I last saw Uchiha but of course…the bitch was gone. What a waste. I took a deep breath and mentally started chucking rocks into the wall. In my mind's eye I was dancing over Uchiha's head and using his decaying body as my own personal play thing—

"That's some jutsu," the Kazekage said to me as I turned around. His face was expressionless, despite his browless brow being draw together in either frustration or concentration. I wouldn't know. He didn't look angry at me. Of course he shouldn't be, I saved his ass…after he stepped in to save mine.

"Yes, well, you can't have it." I said, dropping any sense of decorum. "Where's the rest of the Kage?"

He replied in that monotone, "Off the corridor—"

"See you around, Red!" I said stepping onto the ground through another portal. "I'll try not to hate you next time."

/

I didn't see the Kazekage for a while after that, but when I did see him, we were already at war.

I was with Chojuro for the most part, until I ended up half to hell and half way across the battle field searching for my Aunt Mei. The carnage was heavy. Bodies were everywhere but I didn't bat an eye. I was from the Mist Village after all, we didn't get the name Bloody Mist because we puked up our insides.

Some dead ninja from the Cloud village lunged at me, but I was up and over him in seconds using my Water Release to take his head from his shoulders in one spin. It was one of my favorite long-range attacks but it drained chakra if there wasn't enough water around me. But I was in no mood to fuck around.

I released the jutsu and darted through battling shinobi. Through the chaos, I saw a flash of dark blonde hair and grinned. If I couldn't find Mei, Temari was good enough. She was fighting quite a force on her own; cutting them to ribbons with her wind release like it was child's play. Some genius of course was trying to sneak up behind her. He lounged forward but I threw a portal at his feet, and when he fell from the sky above me I drew my twin swords and diced him in half, molten heat rolling off the blades. His body turned to ashes before he hit the ground. I was the Mizukage's guard for a reason, plus…I was still sore about Uchiha kicking my ass at the summit. I had to take it out on someone.

I leaped behind Temari, and stood at her back. "I knew I'd find you here. Did you miss me?"

"Are we supposed to be friends now?" Temari replied with a smirk.

"Damn. Here I thought we had a connection." I said with a shrug. "I guess I'll go butt in on your Kazekage's fight. Maybe _he_ misses me."

She threw her head back with a laugh, "You _were_ quite a topic of conversation. _Wind Scythe!"_

"Dancing Sun!" I whirled the blades around, sending slashes of molten heat into the throng that surrounded us. "Is that right?"

"Kankuro thinks about you often." Temari replied.

"Ah! I have one of you at least."

Temari laughed again, "We survive this…I'll be your best friend for life!"

"Deal. Let's finish this, shall we?"

"Let's." Temari and I turned on our heels and launched our attacks at the enemy surrounding us.

/

Long story short…we won the war. Madara can kiss my ass. I hope he burns in hell.

/

I walked through the sweltering desert, water in hand. Wishing for death, anything but this.

"We're almost there," the ninja from the Sand said, as we continued our trek. "We'll be there shortly. It's just beyond that mound there."

"I bet it is." I complained, hating Temari, my parents and their connections. Hating everyone.

"Don't complain." Ichigo muttered through the scarf tied around her neck. "It's amazing you were even picked to be the Envoy to the Sand. I would've thought they'd want someone with a better temperament than you."

"You say something, Ichigo? My ears are stuffed with this gritty substance—"

Ichigo rolled her eyes at me, "I would jump at the chance to be a Mist representative for the Sand. At least you're not being sent to the Hidden Rock."

"What do you mean 'at least'? _At least_ you won't have to apply a million liters of lotion on your legs ever yday."

"Just cover them up." Ichigo replied reasonably.

"'Just cover them—are you insane? Do you know how selfish that would be?" I shook my head at her as if she spoke blasphemy. "My legs are a gift. Have care with how you speak."

Ichigo burst into a fit of laughter, scaring our guide half to death when he turned to address us. "We're here."

/

We were greeted at the gates by Kazekage himself along with a crowd of people. I threw on a dazzling smile, and straightened up. I was representing the Mist after all. I had to show off a little bit.

The crowd stood mostly to his left and right, but still giving our group a wide girth. Many of them waved, acting as if they knew me already. I gave them all a smile, sashaying as I moved. My royal blue clothes and strawberry hair a red flag to all those around me that I was different—other, but they didn't seem to mind at all. It was weird to think that only a few months ago, I would have been on the alert here, waiting for any sign of aggression. But I was shocked…almost disappointed in a way. But I was glad too. That meant no more crying Kazekages. I laughed to myself, trying my best to hold it in.

After passing through most of the crowd, I met the Kazekage and his siblings in the middle, a few village elders behind them.

I stood in front of him, taking him in. I didn't quite remember him being this tall or that hair so red—the color of blood. I think he knew I was checking him out, he had to. I was never too subtle. My eyes ran over his face, the paleness of his skin, landing on his eyes a striking sea foam green, rounded with dark rings. A true panda if there ever was one. Was he born like that I wonder?

"Lady Rinmaru Terumi Asakura. Ichigo Fujime. Welcome to the Village Hidden in the Sand," the Kazekage's raspy voice said, stealing my wandering attention. "I hope your stay here will be pleasant and that my villagers make you feel at home."

Ichigo readily replied, her cheeks flushing red, "Thank you, Lord Kazekage. We already do."

"Lord Kazekage." I greeted with a dip. Ichigo bowed as well, forgetting in her flustered state. I cracked a grin, how cute. "Always pleasure. If I remember correctly, I owe you a debt. In my time here, I hope its repaid."

He narrowed his gaze in question, "A debt, you say?"

I glanced over to Ichigo on my left, she ducked her head in deference. Cheeks turning from red to purple. "Yes. During the Great War…" I put my hand on Ichigo's shoulder. "You saved my dearest friend. For that…you have my thanks. I owe you a life…no ten. I owe you ten lives. You will have them."

I could feel the burn of eyes on my skin. The Kazekage watched me carefully, his acceptance clear. His lips parted as if to speak, but his mouth closed again unable to do so. Ichigo choked at my sudden sentimentality, her hand trembling over her lips. After she had mentioned it, I didn't bring it up again. I was selfish. Vain. Reckless. But I repaid my debts…I intended to.

"But!" I said cheerily, stretching the drama away, "Let's leave that for another day. I hear you have food for me?"

The Kazekage's expression flickered at that, and I could see a small smirk break through that stoic expression of his. "You heard correctly."

Temari laughed aloud, "I see you haven't changed."

"Not in the least." Kankuro chuckled too, I see he still adored me.

"I try not to." I flashed them a smile, and greeted the people around us, "Thank you for all of your support. I hope to see each and every one of you at the festival you're throwing in my honor tomorrow night. Feel free to challenge me to game but I warn you…I am a _sore_ winner."

I got a lot of laughs at that, and I smiled gaily, without wearing out my welcome. I couldn't crack another joke. You had to know when to walk away. When to dance and when to flirt. I was flirting with these people, I would make them all love me. Despite Ichigo's words, that's the exact reason I was picked. It was because of my temperament. Because of my incurable vanity. I turned to the Kazekage, "After you."

/

They gave us rooms in the Kazekage's mansion. And much to my surprise and joy…not everything was made out of sand!

After a long bath, I curled up on my bed and tucked into my favorite silk robe. Beside me lay the dresses I'd picked for today. Being a 'lady' had its perks, especially when you loved clothes the way I did. With a sigh, I picked the number that was the least revealing, long with sleeves that hung off my arms secured with gold bands. It was royal blue of course—why wouldn't it be?

I paused as a knock sounded on my door.

"It's Temari." she said. "Can I come in?"

"Of course," I replied, "It's your house, isn't it?"

I was surprised when I found out Temari, Kankuro and the Kazekage were all siblings. Their relationship did seem a little too personal but...so did a lot of peoples.

She slipped inside, "I thought I should warn you that dinner tonight won't involve the elders. It will just be Lord Gaara, Kankuro and I."

"Great," I said dismissing the gown I'd picked in favor of a long-sleeved crop top and a pair of high waisted royal blue shorts. "Putting on a show is tiring sometimes."

"Are you always like that?" Temari asked, obviously referring to my show with the people.

I shrugged. "I enjoy it. If you can't tell I'm a bit full of myself. Any excuse to show off is welcomed, but I'd rather not talk politics after so long in your god forsaken desert."

"I know what you mean. I'm glad Gaara insisted then. For some reason I thought you'd be disappointed."

"No. I'm not _that_ terrible, Temari." I said. "I thought you knew me better than that?"

"Sorry to disappoint. I'll step out and let you change. Your friend is right through that door,"she pointed to the leftmost door beside the closet. "you can enter her room through there. You might want to give her a heads up."

After getting dressed I gave the door a knock, and she curiously opened it and jumped back when she saw me standing there. "Rinmaru! Jeez."

"Who did you think would be standing here? The Kazekage ready to wed?" I said with a twirl of my hand, stepping past her into the room.

I didn't miss the way her cheeks flushed. "Rinmaru..."

"Yes, dearest?"

"I don't know what you're thinking, but be nice."

"I am nice."

"I mean it."

"I mean it too."

"Urgh!" Ichigo had done her hair up in elaborate braids, a few of her finer clothes laid out. "You know what I mean. just try okay?"

"Okay." I said with a dangerous smirk, plans taking shape in my mind-

"You can't be stopped, can you?"

"I'm a wrecking ball, Ichigo. It's what I do."

"Sure." she finally smiled, eyes wandering over her choices. "What should I wear, do you think?"

"Something casual, Temari said. There's no need to go all out." I walked over to her pack and pulled out a pair of marron leggings and gave her a dress like short sleeved shirt with a drop neckline. "cas." I shortened the word, much to Ichigo's annoyance.

"Cas?" she eyed the long drop, "I'll pass." Instead she reached for the black dress like shirt with mid-length sleeves. This was the one I wanted her to pick in the first place but if I gave her that one she would immediately refuse. I swear these people didn't think I knew them.

"That's cute." I said, dropping onto her bed. "If that Kazekage has any hormones he'll make out with you the second he sees you."

"Don't be stupid," she said but seemed to hold her head higher as she slipped on her clothes and even gave her lips a dab of gloss. Smitten.

/

We sat at an intimate dining room table with six seats, placed around the rectangle. Gaara sat at the head of the table. Kankuro sat across from him. Temari sat on his right and at his left a girl with long dark brown hair, decorated with an assortment of jewels sat beside him, chattering away as he seemed to listen intently, hands cupped beneath his chin. They all rose when we walked in the room.

I gestured for them to sit, and took my seat next to Temari. Ichigo sat next to the girl, her eyes darting over to her before abruptly darting away. Ichigo stuck to her food, didn't even so much as glance up again. Temari, Kankuro and I immediately fell into conversation. And when the moment came I addressed the elephant in the room.

"Hello," I said with a gracious smile, catching the stranger's attention. Her head moved to face me and she straightened up cheerily. "I'm afraid we weren't introduced."

Gaara seemed to remember himself, "Forgive me." he said, "Lady Rinmaru Terumi-"

"Rinmaru, please." I amended, my eyes on this new stranger.

"Lady Rinmaru. This is the lady Miharu Abarai, heiress of the Abarai clan in the land of Wind."

I greeted her, "A pleasure."

She returned the gesture. "I really wanted to meet you, you know. My betrothed told me so much about you."

"He did, did he?" I immediately turned my head to look at Kankuro, who was half way through a bite of his spiced chicken. "How nice."

"Yes. _Lord Gaara_ mentioned you quite a lot." She looked over at him possessively, imperiously. Her big brown eyes, stood in sharp contrast to her smile. In her eyes, I could see an edge there. I did my best to hide any edge she may find in my eyes. I was playing diplomat afterall. "He hardly talks but... _you_ seem to be the exception."

And then it clicked.

Dear God.

No you didn't.

I watched her for a moment before looking over at the Kazekage who had chosen to stay out of our conversation. He watched me stoically, eerily still. My eyes did not betray me.

Manners be damned. I threw my head back, and I started to laugh.

* * *

Author's Note: Got this idea from the Naruto Novel Gaara Hiden: A Sandstrom Mirage. Of course, it's not the same but it was heavily inspired by it. I heard your call! I love the amount of support and feedback I received from that one chapter. I have half of the third chapter finished. I should have it uploaded by Monday at the latest. This chapter was more set up. Expect more from chapter 3.


	3. Chapter 3

Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto.

 **How I Met Your Father**

Chapter 3: More Than A Little In Love

* * *

A little fun...

* * *

I was truly the only one laughing. The room was so quiet, if you really listened I swear you could probably hear all of our hearts beating respectively. Everyone else was swimming in a sea of awkward, trying to stay afloat. Meanwhile, I reveled in it, laughing a little louder just for the hell of it, tears pricking my eyes. It had gotten so bad that Ichigo had looked up from her meal and shot me a warning look which went all but ignored by myself…naturally.

"Is something funny, Lady Rinmaru?" Miharu asked, lifting her brow, and raising the octave of her voice in a way that made her sound and look more feminine, tinier. It was one of the oldest tricks in the book, I would know. I've been known to pull it every blue moon.

"Of course, why else would I be laughing?" I said, earning a chuckle turned rough cough from Kankuro. Temari was the only one overly concerned with her food. "It's hilarious. In fact," I took a bite of my spiced chicken, savoring it all the way down. "I can't think of much else that could possibly equal it in hilarity."

Miharu was having trouble fighting back the frown that was wrestling with her forced smile. For a lady she's not too practiced in the art of Fake. "Which is?"

"Your betrothal." I laughed again, barely getting out the word before I cracked up. Temari slammed her knee into mine, forcing me to behave. "You have to understand, Lord Kazekage, when we met…almost a year ago, I didn't peg you for the relationship type. That's why I find all of this… _wondrously_ …" I closed my eyes, trying to hold it in. "hilarious."

Miharu was barely hiding the hatred in her eyes now, despite the pleasant smile on her lips. I didn't blame the girl, if I were her, I'd hate me too. But…then again, I would say it. "I see."

"But," I said again, wiping away all traces of my outburst. "You must forgive me. I have the worst sense of humor. Now, tell me, where are you from again, Princess?"

Her eyes lightened at the princess remark, and she quickly turned her attention away from Gaara, and on to me. He was quiet through this exchange, watching like a fly on the wall as his future beloved told me about her life story, launching into some tirade about some place somewhere just over the rainbow where blue birds fly…you know, the usual.

/

"Wow," I leaned back in my chair, disbelief still very imbedded into my brain. "That's just…wow."

"What do you mean?" Kankuro asked, throwing a card down into the pile. "Gaara's the most eligible bachelor in the village. He has a lot of fangirls."

"Yeah," I said, placing my own card down with a smirk. "But you don't marry one. If I married every moron that followed me around—" I paused thinking better of it. "Anyway, good for him."

Temari snorted, but didn't comment.

I sensed the shade. I could practically taste it. "Anything you want to share with the class?"

Temari pursed her lips, shaking her head, "It's nothing."

"What? Tell me?" I begged, shooting Ichigo a look, she was still quiet from the dinner. "Is the princess a witch?"

Temari kept quiet.

Kankuro glanced at his sister, "You have to remember Temari…it's what Gaara wants besides nothing's definite yet."

"Sure." She muttered underneath her breath, officially making the subject drop. I wasn't nosy by any means, but gossip? Oh, gossip was a dish best served with a side of salt and touch of shade. Not necessarily in that order.

After the dinner, I invited them all into my rooms to play cards. Everyone but the Kazekage and his future wifey, of course. I didn't feel bad though, the guy barely contributed to conversation as it was. He just… _observed_ it. It was a bit creepy.

Kankuro threw down a card, and I shook my head, "Bullshit. Pick it up."

"Are you sure about that?" he said, with a shit eating grin. "That's quite a pile you'll have to pick up."

"I'm sure because I have both of those bitches." I said victoriously, "take them." Kankuro swore, gathering the cards.

"You had to know it wouldn't work, Kankuro." Temari commented like it was the obvious thing in the world. "You can't bluff."

"It doesn't help that I'm an _actual_ god at this game. I am the Queen of Lies and Betrayal." I threw down my last ace, and dramatically stood to my feet.

"Yeah, no kidding," Kankuro muttered and I slapped his arm.

I gave him a wink, and watched as his freshly washed face turned slightly pink. I was still pleased to see my affect hadn't worn off, despite the obvious lies I fed him, "Anyone wants seconds?"

"I'll go again."

"Me too." Ichigo said.

"Count me in." Temari commented.

"Wait for me. I'm going get some more of that chicken," I said, standing to my feet.

"Here, we can have someone bring it." Kankuro started to stand.

"It's fine," I waved him off. "As long as I won't get arrested, I should be fine."

"Okay. Just take the stairs and then take an immediate right, it's near where we ate dinner."

"Cool." I said, "Don't peek at my cards either, or I'll know."

I did as I was bid, walking slow to welcome the silence that wrapped around me. It was unlike my home with my parents. People milled about, servants giggled and gossiped but respectfully bowed when I walked into the room. The seemed so alive, so happy. I guess these people didn't have much to do with only four people living in such a large place.

Every window I passed gave me sand, sand, and darkness. I think I hated it, but…I couldn't tell just yet.

I made it into the kitchen and found Red, munching on the chicken I'd wanted for myself. I let my irritation show a bit, "Is that _all_ the chicken?"

He peeked up from his feast, like an animal caught thieving. "I'm sorry." Was his quiet reply, "I didn't think anyone would want anymore."

With a dramatic sigh, I grabbed up his discarded fork. I'd wager he'd accidentally grabbed two and started working on the other half of the chicken.

He sat in silence, stunned.

Through bites, my lips began to curve into a smile. "You don't talk much, do you Lord Kazekage?"

He swallowed his food, and answered as if to refute my claim. "There's no need to stand on ceremony. As long as you're staying here, you can call me Gaara."

"Well, _Gaara_ , you don't talk much do you?"

Gaara paused in his eating to observe me. Damn him.

"There you go," I said, throwing one hand up in exasperation. "observing again."

He blinked in clear confusion, his head tilting to the side, "I don't follow." Sounding damn tired to boot. Shit, did this guy ever sleep?

"You hardly ever respond," I said, pointing my fork at him, "you just…" I ran quiet and stared at him to demonstrate, " _watch._ It's creepy."

Gaara was silent a while, but he released a sound similar to a laugh, I couldn't be sure though, it also sounded like he was choking, "I've never had that pointed out to me before."

"Yes, well you're the Kazekage," I rolled my eyes, "Most people wouldn't say anything. You're probably scaring that princess of yours half to hell. But I'm untouchable. I can say whatever the hell I want to you, I don't live here. If I were you though, I'd do it for fun…just to mess with people. See how long they could take it before they snap. But…I'm not a good person."

"I disagree." He said confidently, voice dry as the sand outside his door. "you say what you mean and you don't cut corners. It's admirable."

I frowned at him, having had my fill of chicken, I stood to my feet. "That doesn't make me good. For instance…" I walked around the table and paused at the door, "I'm going to go back upstairs to play cards with your siblings, Lord Gaara, and I'm _not_ going to invite you."

"I see." his voice was low, contemplative. "That's fine."

I paused in the door way, irked he didn't fight me, my eyebrow twitching half way up my forehead. " _'That's fine'_? Aren't you going to ask why?"

"I don't want to impose—"

"It's _your_ house, Gaara." I rolled my eyes, "If you must know, I don't know if I like you all that much."

"Why is that?"

"I don't get you." I said simply, "That's all the reason I need." I paused again, my hand hanging onto the doorframe. "See…told you I'm not a good person."

When I left, I think I heard him chuckle, but most importantly, despite my comment, I could feel his eyes follow me up the stairs. Well, fuck you Gaara.

/

"The Mist would like access to your abundance of herbs, in exchange for our fish and fruit. Trade, of course, will be monitored and I like to think we worked out a contract that will be mutually beneficial to all parties involved." I leaned forward and opened up my folder of paper, emboldened with the Hidden Mist symbol. "If you would please refer to page three and read at your leisure. If you have any questions, please don't hesitate to contact me."

The group hurhured and nodded, seemingly pleased with the information before them. The Kazekage's eye scrutinized the page thoroughly, before he looked up and met my gaze. "Lady Rinmaru, I have a question about the clause on section 12. Page five."

With their attention turned to their Kazekage, the nods suddenly stopped and they began searching for the page themselves.

I gave him my most gracious smile, "Is there an issue, Lord Kazekage?"

"It states that the Sand Village is responsible for ensuring that the transportation of the goods and services are not thwarted in any way, and if any harm comes to the goods, the Mist will be compensated regardless of any outside forces or unforeseen circumstances." After reading Gaara, matched my gaze. "There's no section stating the same will be required of you, Lady Rinmaru."

 _Time to turn on the charm,_ I leaned back in my chair, not bothering to glance at the pages before me. I knew them word for word. I helped drafted it. I knew exactly what it said and what it didn't say. "Did you read on to page six, where it states that the Mist Village will regularly send shinobi to ensure that the goods arrive."

"I read that part as well." Gaara lifted one page as he spoke to me, "The problem is that unlike the clauses that hold the Sand Village accountable. No such clauses exist for the Mist Village. Meaning, if damage befalls, the goods we receive, before their scheduled arrival, we won't be compensated for their loss."

"Huh," I waved a hand. "I see what you mean, an oversight, no doubt. You and I can rectify it, I'm sure. When do you have the time?"

"Now is fine."

I forced a smile. _Of course it is._ "I'm sure these gentlemen would _much_ rather return to their homes. We have been at this all morning…and its coming into the afternoon. Perhaps a little rest will help clear our heads?"

There was no doubt the men around him were growing tired. Restless. Ten years ago, an extra two hours wouldn't have bothered them. But the idea more than bothered them now, they just didn't say it.

Gaara looked around the group calmly, expressionless. "Very well. You're all dismissed." I stood to leave, "Lady Rinmaru, I would still like to discuss a few clauses with you. If You don't mind."

Oh, I minded. I really did. That tone of his!

I'd underestimated him. The sand too, it was coming back to bite me.

/

The men cleared out of the room one by one, each pausing to greet their "lord Kazekage" and myself before leaving with more than a little pep in their steps. You had to love to hate old people.

Gaara's eyes ran through the document again, this time he marked each problem he found with a red pen. I could tell when he was _severely_ displeased by something because his non-existent brow would draw to gather and this deep "hmmm" sound would escape his throat before he would write out a list of adjustments to the side on a separate piece of paper. We sat like this for thirty minutes before I started to grow impatient.

I was a diplomat because I could usually use my charm to turn things in my favor. A well-placed smile could save me from most troubles. I was a ninja because what I lacked in diplomacy I more than made up for it with action. A well-placed kunai—well, need I say more?

I had to admit though…there was something interesting about the way he moved—spoke even. He was all confidence here, _this_ was his domain and he was king. In his own home, he was quieter, his presence muted. But here, highlighted against the earthy tones, he looked so alive, so bright. A force. He was domineering and so sure. No hesitation. Even the way he sat was something else—a different beast. I wonder how far that confidence extended, or, more importantly, how _good_ it would taste.

My tongue moved across my lips. My lips parted, releasing a very satisfied sigh and I leaned forward slightly like a lion about to pounce on its prey—

I bit my tongue for its insolence. I didn't draw blood; however, I couldn't completely tame what I was…or what attracted me. I couldn't expect my body to so readily throw away all that I taught it, could I? But still this was the Kazekage, Temari and Kankuro's little brother. More importantly this was the man Ichigo had a crush on _. Rinmaru, exercise restraint. This is not your toy to break._ I told myself that but I itched to get closer.

Snatching up my own folder, I stood to my feet and swaggered around the long table, running my left fingers along it's smooth surface as I approached Gaara. He didn't look up at me but the pen in his hand halted to a stop as he observed my hand's slow approach. I made barely a sound but his attention was immediately captured, as if the movement somehow hypnotized him.

His eyes followed up the length of my bare arm, moving along the curve of my shoulder, across my collarbone and up, up to my parted lips. " _Lord Kazekage_ …" I said his name like I was breathing it in, trying to capture it. The tone didn't go unnoticed. He stopped breathing.

This close I could see the extent of his blush. His cheeks burned pink, meeting with the coloration along his neck. I leaned against the edge of the table, but moved toward him, minimizing the space between us.

He was silent a moment, two. And then finally he seemed to gather himself. "Yes, Lady Rinmaru?" his sea foam gaze was impassive and yet showed his readiness to listen. His right hand twitched barely a centimeter, but I could see it. He was very uncomfortable.

Grinning, I sat on top of the table, tapped the papers in front of him and eased away to give him more space to breathe. I had to resist the urge to flirt, but you don't understand. I was literally gritting my teeth. I was fighting against everything I was!

"Can I see this?" I said through my teeth, glancing down at the overabundance of red ink. "Are these all the changes?"

"That's it." Came his dry reply, freeing me from my need. The muscles in my stomach relaxed from their tightened state and I could see him clearly again. It didn't come a moment too soon either. I was about to kiss him right then and there—maybe get in a few gropes. Who knows?

I lifted it from the table and went through the changes line by line. I crossed my legs, pretending not to notice the way they bumped into his arm. I was pushing it. God, I was pushing it. He stilled at the contact but pretended not to notice.

A grin broke out across my lips. "You know, Lord Kazekage?"

He raised a brow in question.

"I'm impressed." I said placing the folder back on to the table and pulling out my own. "I think I'm finally starting to like you."

His lips pulled up at the end, in what I consider to be a satisfied smile. "I'm relieved, to say the least, but how did I manage that?"

"That contract of yours looks exactly like the one I have here." I pulled the real contract from the back of the folder and presented it to him like it was a gift. "It has slightly different wording but every problem in the contract you discovered without any help." I gave him an impressed huff. "Every detail."

Curious, he gently took the papers and began to look through them, his eyes widening with every word. "You…you were testing me."

"Of course, I was." I said with a shrug. "Why wouldn't I?"

"And if I hadn't noticed?"

"Well, the Sand Village would be at a disadvantage, wouldn't it?"

"I don't know if I appreciate being tested in this way. You jeopardized the very nature of our alliance with your contract. You must realize if I had not caught these issues it would only brew mistrust among our shinobi." Gaara said, all business. I swear it was like talking to my grandfather. "It could very well lead to more bloodshed."

"That would be your problem…wouldn't it?" I said, eyeing the way his eyes tightened on the ends. "It would have been your error. I drew the contract, so of course I'm going to shape it to benefit the Mist. It's naïve of you to think that I wouldn't."

That smile of his was all gone now, replaced with a blank look that bordered on irritation. "I would think that that wouldn't be a gamble you would make."

"You don't know me that well, Lord Gaara." I smirked eagerly, loving the way, the clear irritation was etched into his every word. "I'm capable of all kinds of things.

"That's something I'll have to keep in mind."

"So!" I leaned back onto my hands, giving us more space. In Gaara's fury, he'd leaned forward probably more than he realized. "Are we done here?"

"It appears that way." He responded, pushing his seat back to stand. "Thank you for your time, even if mine was certainly wasted." He said this last bit bitterly, a slight edge to his tone.

"Wasted?" I laughed, "I did you a favor. Now you have the day off. Not using it would be a waste."

"Hhmn." That inch of a smile was back again, amused. "I assume you plan to utilize it to the fullest?"

"Naturally." I slipped off the table and onto my feet, moving toward the door in the same motion. "I'm going to see if your villagers are as great as you claim. Your local dress shops will receive a thorough examination. I'm rather experienced with those…" I smirked shamelessly.

"Would you…" He swallowed, forcing the words out, "would you mind company?"

I abruptly paused at the door, both taken aback by his offer and shocked he'd kept conversation going this long. I guess even out of meetings he could learn to talk for long periods. Good for him.

I turned to look him over. I narrowed my gaze at him, taking in his appearance. He held his hands awkwardly at his sides, a differently man than the one at the table. Even when he asked his voice sounded unsure if it should. He didn't seem that awkward around others, quiet, but not nervous like that. I allowed myself a smile. Was it because he found me attractive?

Oh, how the gods are good. This will be fun.

"I guess so." I said, stalking toward him. "I plan to see everything though…everything."

"I assure you, that's fine. I wouldn't have offered if I didn't intend to make a day of it." Gaara responded. "You did do both of us a favor."

"Huh," I said with folded arms, looking him over with mild suspicion. "That's good to know. But I have a quick question before we go anywhere."

"What is it?" His brow furrowed, wanting to help in any way he could. How cute.

"You're not attracted to me…are you, Lord Gaara?" Gaara's eyes grew to the size of dinner plates, pink spreading across his cheeks. I moved forward, so close he had to retreat back into the table. He bumped into it, making me laugh almost immediately. "You're so adorable."

"You were doing that on purpose." Gaara not so stealthily not answering the question.

"Why else would I do it?" I waved him off, "Anyway, you're free from answering. If I embarrass you too much, you may have me arrested."

His expression had returned to its normal state but he let out a relieved sound all the same.

"But I have to warn you. Don't go getting a crush on me, Gaara," I said with a smirk, leaning forward to brush my fingers long the line of his hair, across that tattoo and down his cheek. "I'll only break your heart."

/

Almost a year ago, the two of them had met. It was strange, Gaara remarked, that he found himself with her just now. It was even stranger that he asked to tag along. There was something about her: a combination of attitude and appearance that reminded him of Naruto Uzumaki—a reckless all-consuming outlook that he desperately wanted to take on for himself, even if his nature didn't allow it. He was making progress however, one step at a time. He needed to if he were ever going to please the elders and get engaged. He figured Rinmaru, as personable as she was, could help him with that.

"Is there a reason you're hanging out with me, Lord Kazekage?" Rinmaru asked walking in front of him, dodging those in front of her without having to look back. It was clear that she was pleased with her ability.

"Please," he began. "As I said— "

"Gaara, Gaara. I get it. My bad." She waved her hand, "Answer the question."

"I wanted your help with something."

"And you couldn't ask your brother or sister?"

"I wouldn't want them to worry."

She stopped dead in front of him, her bright electric green eyes, flying up to meet his. "If it's serious…you should tell them. I won't be involved in family squabbles, no matter how much I flirt with your brother." The seriousness in her eyes wavered a second. Gaara chuckled. She seemed to make herself laugh more than anyone else.

"It's not like that. It's…more of a personal matter."

Rinmaru clamped her hands over her ears and turned on her heel, "Lalalala…"

"Is this necessary?" Gaara said tiredly as he tried to grab her attention again. Why was she being so difficult? Was she like this all the time? Did she ever grow tired of it? He was tired already and they'd only been out six minutes. "It isn't inappropriate. I wouldn't subject you to something like that."

"I don't really know you that well."

"You've already said that— "

"Cute. You remember our conversations. You know, I'd keep you if you weren't already taken—Oh! Let's go in there!" She grabbed his hand, much to Gaara's surprise and pulled him into the nearest boutique. The bell on the door dinged open and upon spotting the two of them the shop owner descended.

For some crazy reason he'd thought her hands would be warm. But they were almost chilly despite the warm weather. There was some expression about hands and hearts he'd heard Matsuri say one time. What was it? Cold hands, cold heart?

"My Lord Kazekage!" the shop owner rushed toward them, and ducked her head in a deep bow. "To what do I owe the honor?" she rose only when Gaara gestured for her to, and she peeked up at Rinmaru, still holding on to his hand much to his embarrassment. "This is Lady Rinmaru Terumi Asakura, right? I remember you from yesterday, m'lady."

"Is that so? Well…" Rinmaru walked up to the shop keep, but it wasn't really a walk, it was more fluid that, graceful and yet completely predatory. It was a strangely fascinating combination. Rinmaru placed her right hand underneath the shop keeper's chin and lifted it to meet the woman's eyes. "It's a pleasure to meet you. Lord Kazekage has told me great things about this shop…his sister, Lady Temari comes here often. She adores it."

The woman swelled with pride, her plump cheeks, pinkening with her blush. "Thank you for the praise, Lord Kazekage!"

Gaara accepted her thanks hesitantly, he hadn't said anything at all about the shop. He barely knew it even existed until now. Sadly, he couldn't remember this woman's name for the life of him despite having seen her face in the crowds that surrounded him. "Really it's— "

"Amazing!" Rinmaru spun around, catching the eye of one the few people eyeballing the two of them without shame. "Let me guess…" Rinmaru zeroed in on the woman's face. "You look like a…Nanao. Am I right?"

The woman looked like she'd just witnessed the second coming. "My Lady, how did you know?"

"A beautiful name for a beautiful woman." Rinmaru replied simply, turning her attention to a table housing scars in various spring shades. "Lovely…"

The woman hurried to her side, forgetting all about her Kazekage, much to Gaara's relief. He waved to those in the shop eyeing him hopefully and prayed they wouldn't approach. By the look on their faces however, they seemed to have drawn their own conclusions about Rinmaru.

"Would you like to try it on m'lady?" Nanao asked, grinning at the kunoichi. "That color suits you."

"Sea foam green, huh?" Rinmaru winked at Gaara, who averted his eyes after chastising himself for staring. Temari had told him it was rude and Rinmaru had said something about it last night but… "What do you think, Lord Gaara?"

She put the scarf over her hair and threw it around her shoulders, getting close to him. She dropped her voice to a whisper, "Would you kiss me now if you weren't engaged?"

Blinking, he stepped back. "I'm…not engaged."

"For a ninja, you're not very good at avoiding questions. You sound breathless, Gaara." Rinmaru took another step, invading his space once more. "am I doing that to you?"

He stuttered words even his own brain couldn't understand.

"I don't have to stop if you don't want me to." She was at his ear now, making the room feel too warm for his comfort.  
Gaara tried to move to the door, "I think I'll wait outside—"

"Don't be a bore, Gaara." Rinmaru said, catching his arm before he could run away. "I'll leave you alone. You've got to stop taking me so seriously, it just makes the game that much more fun."

 _So that's it?_ Relief washed over him followed by tinge of disappointment.

He knew Rinmaru noticed the relief because she smiled like a Cheshire cat. "You make this too easy."

With a laugh she spun back to the woman, "He loves it." She removed the scarf, "It's a shame I can't take it with me. I left my money in my room and I can't ask Lord Kazekage to pay for it."

"It's free!" the woman declared. "I can't imagine it looking better on a finer woman."

Rinmaru's voice filled with concern, and Gaara had to wonder if even an ounce of it was genuine. "Are you sure?"

The woman nodded vigorously, practically dragging Rinmaru to look at other items. "Is there something else you'd like, Lady—"

"Rinmaru. My friends call me Rinmaru, Nanao."

Gaara watched as the plump shop keep collapsed in unabashed happiness.

/

Gaara glanced at the time. "We should be heading back now."

"Cool." Rinmaru replied, multiple shopping bags swinging from his arms. "You want to help me with these?"

Gaara took the horde he'd been given without complaint, another thing Temari had taught him to do when dealing with woman. Carry what they tell you to and don't complain. It was a lesson his brother had yet to learn.

"You're quite the gentleman. I hate you even less now."

Gaara chuckled, and her eyes flew to his face, grinning herself.

"Isn't that easy?" Rinmaru pointed to his face, "Laughing isn't so hard."

"I don't claim it is." Gaara said, glancing down to his feet and back up again, nodding to the greetings he received from passersby. "I'm just not used to it."

"Still?" Rinmaru raised an eyebrow at him, "Aren't you seventeen now?"

"My life before all this was very different." Gaara replied, eyes still forward. It was easier to talk about it now, even in passing. The tears that used to come to his eyes had all but dried up, along with the hatred in his heart.

"Huh. You were a jinchuriki, right?"

There was no hint of hatred in her tone, only curiosity, wonder even. "I was. I still have a connection with the One-tail even now…I can still hear him."

She nodded. "What did you want help with again?"

He'd all but forgotten, lost in her rampage, swept along like a log in a river. It wasn't an unpleasant feeling. "My elders want me to get engaged. You've met the woman they want to make this arrangement with…I'm trying to get better at this part of the relationship."

"The day to day?" Rinmaru laughed, throwing her head back with the force of it. Gaara immediately wished he hadn't said anything. "That's hilariously sad. Dear god, Gaara what the hell have you been doing your whole life? Fucking around in sand boxes."

"Your use of language is impressive. I've never heard expletives uttered so often by someone of your rank."

She rolled her eyes, "You're getting better at not answering me, but not quite. Again, what have you been doing?"

"I wasn't really exposed to people very often." It was a hazard, he thought.

"Yeah, no shit." Rinmaru shrugged, "I'm the wrong person to ask. I'm good with people, only because I understand that on the lowest level all people want to be liked. I just give people what they want. I'm a liar, a heartbreaker, a thief. I'm the last person you should ever ask for help."

"You seem to see yourself in a different light than others. I doubt anyone else sees you that way…or at least to the extent that you do."

"Whatever." Came her sharp reply. Her tone took him off guard, but he didn't comment. "Anyway, I have a friend who's a lot better at this day to day nice thing. She'll be ecstatic to help you out. You can work on it at the festival tonight, unless you have a date that is?"

"No." he said.  
"Good."

"And do you as well?" Gaara said, "Have a date that is?"

"No. I prefer my men the way I prefer my enemies," Rinmaru gave him a conspiratorial wink, widening her eyes for greater effect. "in large groups, ripe for the picking."

Gaara furrowed his brow at that "That sounds awful." Stressful too. "How did you know that woman's name by the way?"

Rinmaru shrugged, nonchalantly. "It was on the door."

/

"He's insufferable." I complained flopping down onto Ichigo's bed.

"Who are we talking about now?" she responded, as she stared into the mirror, adjusting her hair.

"Your Lord Kazekage."

"He's not my Kazekage."

"Oh," I smirked at the hilarity of it all, closing my eyes. Leaving her expression to my wild imagination. "Oh, but you wish."

"Whatever." Ichigo sighed heavily but pushed the subject anyway, it didn't take a jonin to figure out why. "What did Lord Gaara do to you this time?"

"You mean besides existing?"

"What is your problem with him?" she huffed out, her voice cracking to reach the higher octave. "He's so sweet and thoughtful… He's practically perfect."

"Yes." I agreed. "I don't believe there's ever been a more perfect pain in my ass." I waited. "No. Not in the least."

"Elaborate."

"He axed six clauses in my contract. Six! He redid four." I opened my eyes and sat up, crossing my arms.

"Wasn't that contract insanely unfair?"

"Not for us."

"Well, what did you expect?" Ichigo said, her exasperation apparent.

"I expected him to not know what the hell was going on."

"And you're mad at him for …being able to read?"

I poked out my lips and tilted my head to the right, "When you say it like that it sounds ridiculous…"

She rolled her eyes so hard they looked like they were about to sprout from her head. "Well?"

"Well nothing." I sighed, "I gave him the real contract and then he asked for a favor."

Ichigo's eyes widened, "You didn't. Rinmaru, say you weren't just testing him."

"I won't. Why would I?" I turned to her with a cheese eating grin. "you just said it yourself."

"Urgh!"

"Urgh!" I copied her, all smiles. "I love making that sound too. I feel sixteen again, don't you? Now, all I need now is my mother to barge in and ask me questions—"

Ichigo allowed herself a laugh before she jumped on top of the bed. "So what favor did he ask for?"

"Help interacting with women." I said lamely, "what a dork."

I didn't miss the way she narrowed her eyes at me, like she would electrocute me if she could. "Lord Gaara is _not_ a dork."

"He's hopeless."

"He's unique."  
"Shit, Ichigo, you've only known the guy for a day and you're already this amped to bear his children?"

Ichigo blushed, hiding her face, "That's not—I didn't—whatever—"

"He better have magic semen with all the effort you're putting into him—Hey! your aim sucks by the way!" Ichigo threw a pillow at me and I dodged effortlessly. "Alright, fine. I'll leave it. Anyway, what would you say if I told you I turned down Gaara's request for help?"

"I'd say that you were a terrible person."

"Now," I paused for dramatic effect, "What would you say if I said I found someone better than me?"  
"Who?"  
"You."

* * *

Author's Note: I know I said Monday but Wednesday had a nicer ring to it. I want to thank all of those who Favorited/followed/reviewed. You guys inspired me to keep going. This chapter was a little longer than normal but…oh well. Next chapter is the festival, expect something to go very wrong.


	4. Chapter 4

Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto only my original characters.

 **How I Met Your Father**

Chapter 4: Always The Space Between

* * *

Let it begin with me!

* * *

The morning before the meeting, Gaara had escorted Miharu and her party to the front gates. She looked up at him with big brown eyes as he searched for better words than "goodbye." He'd hardly known her though, even after a week in her presence he still felt that way despite her readiness to discuss her family and various hobbies.

"I've had a wonderful time here, Lord Kazekage." Miharu said, bowing her head, "I look forward to returning as well as seeing you." She lifted her head, bright eyes matching his.

Gaara opened his mouth, which was suddenly very dry. He held it open—stunned—while he threw out colder, less personal responses. "We await your return." He managed to squeeze out perhaps a moment too late. He surmised that wasn't the best response either. She blinked rapidly, nodded and turned to go.

Kankuro stood next to him as the group disappeared. He put his hand on his brother's shoulder, shaking his head, "That wasn't…awful?"

Gaara turned, heading back to the village. "No. It was worse."

"You just need practice. It's only because you think she's beautiful that it's hard. Plus, having to remember that you may be marrying this woman doesn't help." Kankuro kept his tone light, trying to sound enthused.

"Realizing that fault and actively doing something about it are two different things."

"You're not wrong," Kankuro gestured with his hands, Gaara appreciated that he was trying.

"Let's head back."

/

After Gaara and I returned from our shopping, we met with the Elders again and finalized the contract. I shouldn't have to tell you that the _real_ contract was accepted. That one—another work of art—was immediately welcomed into the fold, thus beginning the new relationship between Mist and Sand. My Aunt had off handedly remarked once that the Mist and Sand Villages were as opposite as heaven and earth. She wondered then, as she nursed a cup of premium sake (a parting gift from yours truly), if the villages would always be in conflict in the same way or, better or worse yet, if we would need each other in the same respect.

My aunt could be philosophical when she was in the mood, inspiring even. I, on the other hand, never tended to deal in either currency, nor did it ever rub me the right way. We liked to dream that we were two peas in a pod but…

I laughed bemusedly, twirling water around in my sake cup. I never drank often, just pretended to for her sake. "I'd rather be shat on by a thousand birds than have to rely on a single _speck_ of dirt from that forsaken hell hole."

My Aunt Mei laughed at that, throwing her head back in one of the few ways we mirrored each other. "A thousand?"

"No less than a thousand," I replied, and paused as if I were thinking deeply. "Perhaps two thousand, depending on the weather."

"Brilliant," she took another sip of sake, and then sighed. "I am sorry you feel that way…but you're still going."

I pursed my lips, but did not argue. I wasn't Ao; I knew when she wanted me to argue and when she wanted me to bow my head and obey. I wasn't in love with the sight of power, but it was one of the seven great wonders of our world. I more often than not respected it.

I tilted my head, "As you wish, Lady Mizukage."

Her electric green eyes, drifted over to my face. We observed each other quietly. I gave her nothing. In her expression, however, I saw a touch of guilt there, perhaps a spark of regret, but she wouldn't relent. When you were in charge, you played your pieces. And in whatever game she was playing now, I was her queen. An almost unstoppable piece. And that thought was enough to make me smile. I walked over to her, and took a seat to her left, dropping my head into her lap.

After a moment, I spoke, "What are you planning?"

In all honestly, if she would have said "world domination" I would have sighed a blood pact with her, there and then. But, alas, my aunt wasn't that ambitious.

She began to run her fingers through my strawberry locks, humming a song my father would sing for me whenever I asked. I knew he also sang the same for her.

Her words came from a deep sigh, one of contentment. An action that came from conviction of the highest degree, "Peace."

" _Peace."_ I repeated her words, and gritted my teeth to hold in my answering laugh bubbling up in my throat. If only she wasn't serious.

I closed my eyes, allowing myself to be bathed in her hopefulness—her glorious naiveté. Perhaps if it bathed in it enough, I could be reborn?

I cracked a smile.

 _Not likely._

/

Gaara and Kankuro had met up after the meeting, preparing for the upcoming festival. The day before, he had met with every vendor and ensured that everything was ready. There would be over a hundred booths, covering several streets, decorated with color. Several booths of course would sell, Mist Village favorites for their guests. The others would host all sand village goods. They didn't have festivals often, but when they did, they spared little expense. Truthfully, if Rinmaru hadn't been the granddaughter of a feudal lord, they wouldn't have done things so extravagantly. But, Gaara had learned a long time ago that there was a lot of ceremony involved in running a village. He hated no less than half of the traditions he was forced to uphold, but that one was by far his least favorite. Gaara would probably save the village a lot more money and accomplish much more in a year if he didn't have to uphold the village's image as well as his own. He probably also wouldn't be attempting a betrothal…but that's neither here or there. It wasn't for him, after all. It was for the security of their village—to give his people a more secure transition into the next Kazekage. Gaara was young but if something happened to him, a child would make things easier. At least, that's what he told himself. Temari and Kankuro weren't so pleased by his revelation three weeks ago.

Temari was struck speechless, while Kankuro attempted to get his brother to lay out all of the details. After he was nearing the end, Temari flew into a rage and tracked down the first Elder she could find (Gaara and Kankuro trying to calm her). The three of them tried to explain matters to her but no.

"Kankuro, do you hear yourself?" she said, screaming, making the Elder back up into a corner. "He's barely seventeen and you want to shackle him to some power grabbing witch?"

"Temari don't—" Kankuro tried to cut in.

"No, Kankuro. If you cared about him the way you say you do, then you wouldn't let this happen." Temari snapped, shutting down Kankuro's next response.

Gaara, along with his brother became quiet. After a moment, he placed arms around his sister's shoulders and gently squeezed her in an embrace. "Please, Temari. I want this…please understand."

She didn't, but she apologized to Kankuro and walked back to her room without a word. She hadn't commented on the matter since then, and neither had Kankuro. Gaara hadn't mentioned it and none of them thought about it until Miharu had shown up at their village gates.

Kankuro stood in his doorway presently, arms crossed, a grin plastered on his lips. "Temari's not going to let you get away with that."

Gaara glanced down at his clothing, and then eyed himself in his long mirror, "What's wrong with it?"

"Well, nothing's _wrong_ with it, not necessarily, it's just not very festive…or impressive."

"No one is going to be there that I need to impress." Gaara replied, adjusting his collar. He wore his regular clothes but many people, mainly women, had remarked that he looked handsome in them. If he didn't look horrible, he saw no need to change. "My villagers appreciate me as I am and Miharu has gone home…"

Kankuro reached to the back of his head and began scratching his hair, an act Gaara noticed he did whenever he was about to broach a subject that made him uncomfortable. "About that Gaara…"

Gaara turned to face is brother, suddenly concerned, but he knew not to show it, it would only make Kankuro feel worse which, of course, made him speak much slower than normal. "What is it?"

"Temari and I were talking and…" Kankuro took a deep breath, closed the door behind him and approached his brother. "Gaara. You know you don't have to do this, don't you? I mean," his shoulders slumped, his mouth taking on a melancholy smile, "I am your older brother. I should be doing this for _you_ , not the other way around."

"I'm fine. I'd hate to push either of you into something neither of you want. Besides, I've become Kazekage, fought a war and lived. Marriage shouldn't be so difficult in comparison." Even as he said it, he didn't believe it, but he at least sounded sure. His voice didn't waver and he didn't blink at all. He didn't lie, so he wouldn't know if he had a tell.

"You're only seventeen, Gaara. You should have more time. Spend time with more women… _real_ women. Not that pampered doll they're throwing at you."

Gaara frowned, "I'm with women all the time."

"Women…" Kankuro looked uneasy again, "you find…attractive."

"Miharu's attractive." Gaara replied easily enough. It was true. She was beautiful. He was speechless the first time he saw her, but that had more to do with the fact that he knew he'd be marrying her. The idea still made him speechless, but…he would deal with it.

Kankuro paused at that, "I know but…"

"We can't all be Temari," Gaara said dryly, earning himself a chuckle from Kankuro which made him feel warm all over. "She's more personable than both of us combined. You said it yourself. I'm not very practiced at…"

"Wooing a woman?" Kankuro offered with a grin.

"I have no idea what I'm doing, even Rinmaru said so and we've only spent a few hours together."

"Rinmaru…" Kankuro scratched his chin, "She's a _different_ kind of woman, definitely not the kind you want to start out on, that's for sure."

Gaara nodded in agreement, he'd never met anyone so vexing in his entire life. She'd have more luck wooing herself. Even if the thought of her made his stomach clench, tighten in a way he couldn't try to explain, being with Rinmaru was like being in enemy territory. Under no circumstances, should you ever panic. It only feeds the frenzy, makes the torture that much sweeter. He knew from experience, when he lived a different life. And that, of course, felt like millennia ago.

"Be real, Gaara. You're the Kazekage, if you asked any woman in this village they'd marry you in a second." Kankuro emphasized this by snapping his fingers.

"Out of respect for my title, out of loyalty, not out of any real love—"

"Yes, but that's part of the problem. You _wouldn't_ be marrying Miharu out of love. I didn't want to say this, but you know why she's here. Her family wants power, control. Her family has been scheming for generations. She can't love you Gaara. She's been taught to bait and hook. You'll be miserable your entire marriage! Do you want that? Because I don't, not for you. Not for _my_ little brother."

 _Little Brother._

A long time ago, the two words would have meant less than nothing to him, he found it strange that now they seemed to grab hold of his entire being—hold him firmer than any sand coffin he could craft.

Gaara was speechless, his brother's eyes were reddening. The lighthearted part of the conversation had all but evaporated. Kankuro, unlike Temari, had stayed silent on the issue but his reluctance to speak on it had nothing to do with his acceptance, it seemed. As much as Gaara appreciated these still new moments with his brother, he needed this conversation to be done. It wasn't for him that he did this, all of them needed to know that.

"Kankuro." Gaara began, searching his brother's dark gaze, it didn't take long before an understanding passed between them. That was one thing he loved about Kankuro, he may not be as brilliant as Temari, but he understood things in a different way than their sister. "Thank you."

Kankuro nodded, his throat making his next words hoarser than normal, "Just…try and remember that that girl isn't the end all be all. That Ichigo seems to like you. Spend some time with her, she's sweet."

"Does she?" That fact was news to the Gaara, but as everyone seemed to know, he was never any good when it came to matters of the heart.

/

"You look you tasty, Temari." I said, as I strolled down the stairs, taking in the four waiting for me at the bottom.

Temari grinned, "Thanks girl. _You_ look late." Kankuro's dropped jaw told me I looked stunning.

My royal blue lace shirt created a horizon line beneath my collar bone. It was fitted and yet breathable, it hung off my shoulders and reached all the way to my knuckles, leaving my entire toned stomach exposed. I wore a tiny gold choker, to accent the gold barrette I'd had holding my hair to one side. My skirt was a long black silk thing that clung to my waist with a belt of gold and jewels, casually draped around it. The jewels were sapphires, a gift from a lord that wanted my mother's favor and my hand. Even after he found out he couldn't have either, he was eager to let me keep it. The slit in the skirt started mid-thigh, just low enough to hide a pair of mesh shorts and a dagger. I wouldn't be taking my swords with me—they made flirting with lordling men difficult—but I'd hidden weapons seals along my covered wrists. I could have swords if I wanted them, but…I knew they didn't care about the particulars.

Perhaps I should've dressed more modestly, but I was only here to get trade up and going—as a ninja not a lady. Besides, I was having a shitty day, I deserved to break a few hearts.

I shrugged, not bothering to speed up my swaggering down their stairs, if they'd wanted me to move faster they wouldn't have built so many. "A lady is never late. Everyone else is simply—"

"Early." Ichigo finished for me, shinning with a secret smile I knew too well. It was no secret that she had immediately perked up when I revealed that things between Gaara and his Lady Love hadn't been set in stone, handed down by the gods. It made me a little guilty when I remembered how I'd flirted with him, how I'd shamelessly exposed his trickle of attraction and attacked it like tiger would fresh meat. Oh, it was thrilling in the moment. The way his large sea foam green eyes grew tenfold, or the way his skin pinkened at my overt advances. All of it was the nectar of the gods. But…it left me feeling worse than a good flirt should have, left me hating him more than any normal person would.

There would be none of that tonight. I flashed her a grin.

" _Kankuro_ ," I practically purred his name, how I loved to say it. "I can't tell you how much I adore your face, it brings me joy you know?"

Makeup less and exposed, Kankuro ducked his head and adjusted his burgundy shirt which was folded up at the elbows. His scrolls ever present on his back. I expected no less from the guard of the Kazekage. But I was forcing an attraction I barely felt, even though…he _was_ handsome. At least he wasn't off limits. "Yeah, whatever. The routine's getting old, Rinmaru." The deep blush on his face told me otherwise, but I let it go. Not one to kick a dead horse and all that or camel—whichever animal could survive in the desert—if it were both? All the better.

I reached the bottom of the stairs and stopped in front of Gaara. "I hope you plan to entertain me, Gaara. If I'm not," I winked at him mischievously, "I plan to let you know."

"You didn't have to tell me that," Gaara responded, speaking in that soft almost breathless tone he used when he was pleased, or amused. He wasn't difficult to read. "I figured as much."

"I hope you don't disappoint." I turned from him, by passing Ichigo, to grab onto Temari's elbow exposed for me. "Lovely."

Temari dropped her voice, "You're certainly going to turn some heads tonight, poor Kankuro looked like he was about to have a seizure and Gaara—"

"That reminds me," I looked over my shoulder at the three trailing behind us. "Gaara? Make sure you hold onto my Ichigo, the desert makes her faint."

Ichigo flashed me a look of indignation, but almost blushed out of her mind when Gaara moved to stand beside her. Kankuro tried to hide his smug smile, behind his hand. I offered him my right arm with a wink, which he readily took. It seemed we were all in agreement on the matter.

"Will you be alright?" Gaara asked Ichigo softly.

Her eyes darted around nervously, before settling back on his face, "You know Rinmaru, she likes to exaggerate."

"All the same," he offered her his elbow like a gentleman, I rolled my eyes. "I won't risk your health."

If she could have, Ichigo would have died happy.

/

The Sand Village was actually alive. People came out of the wood works in multitudes, children played and chased each other through the streets beneath colorful paper lanterns, and I could hear several instruments drumming in the distance. Couples carried sparklers, men and women alike tried their hands at various booths, and the scent of sweets and delicious barbeque pulled us straight into the fray. The crowd was boisterous, but parted as we walked by each face glowing as they spotted their adored Kazekage. A series of , "Lord Kazekage!" "He's here? Where?" "My dear Kazekage, how are you?" never ceased as we walked past booths. I was recognized along with the siblings, but their love for their lord overran any admiration or wonder they had for me.

I smiled without thinking. For a moment, I thought of my aunt. I thought of the joy on her face as I would return, the revelry that would follow, the adoration I had there surrounded by all those who knew me well…

I chuckled. Perhaps I was spending too much time in the Sand—with that ridiculous Kazekage. It was turning me soft.

I grabbed onto Temari and Kankuro, pulling them away from the two behind us. "Come on! I want to catch a goldfish. Or at least have you point me in the direction of your finest men and have them catch it for me…you know, whatever works best."

"This will be good," Temari remarked, "We'll get to see her in her element. Let's see if she's not all talk."

"Challenge accepted." I gave Temari a mock curtesy. We stood next to a booth that sold dango, and across from it was a young dark haired man still in his ninja garb. He had a handsome profile, but he wasn't extraordinary looking. I was willing to bet that he had an average confidence, but wasn't a chaser unless given reason.

I inclined my head in his direction. "How about this one?"

Kankuro frowned, shaking his head. "I know him. His name is Shoto Higuchi. He's a straight laced kinda guy. He wouldn't be into it."

"How about we place a wager then?" I said. "If I can get him to follow me around the entire night—"

"Now _that's_ too easy," Temari said, crossing her arms, "You're an attractive woman, and he's a guy _all_ by himself. It would be like taking candy from a baby."

"You didn't let me finish," I said smugly, glancing around the area. I pointed to a sandy haired man by a balloon booth, two medium build guys by the taiyaki stand, and a nobleman surrounded by two guards. "I will also have all of these men following me around in exactly 30 minutes and…by the end of the night three of them will have confessed their love for me."

Kankuro's mouth dropped open, his lips curling up into a smile. "Now, that I gotta see."

"And if I don't deliver?"

"You'll have to do anything we ask for three days." Temari supplied, placing her hands on her hips. "You still want to make the bet?"

"Of course," I waved her off, they didn't realize how easy this would be. Getting rid of them, now that would be the hard part. "I love a challenge."

"And what do you want if you win?" Kankuro got an excited glint in his eyes that matched Temari's calm assurance.

I adjusted my necklace and stared straight at my first mark. He'd just looked up and the two of us caught eyes. He looked shocked to see me, a hint of recognition there, perhaps he remembered me from yesterday morning? I let my lips part, one eyebrow raised slightly (as if I was shocked to see him too, as if he was the most handsome man I'd ever seen, as if he'd just stolen my very thoughts from my mind). My lips curled into a smirk and I lifted my hand, signaling him to draw near with a single finger. "Nothing." I said, as the man sent me a grin that reached his eyes. One hand shot to his hair to tidy it before he stepped forward, shooting through the river of people that passed between us. "I was planning to do this anyway. An audience makes it that much more fun."

Both Temari and Kankuro turned around as he reached me, but I knew that they were listening in. Shoto, my first target, only had eyes for me.

"You're Lady Rinmaru, right?" he asked, Shoto had dark brown eyes, an easy smile. Easy prey.

I nodded my head with a smile, my arms tucked behind my back as I gave us little distance. "And you're Shoto Higuichi," I said, "well-known shinobi of the Sand Village."

His eyes flickered in surprise, amazed, "Wow, how did you know my name?"

I shrugged, turning my head to the side, peering up at him from beneath my eyelashes, almost like I was embarrassed. "You wouldn't believe how many people I had to ask…"

His right hand flew to his hair, his face pinkening, "You, uh, you asked about me? Why would you do that—I mean why would you want to know my name?" he swallowed thickly, clearly nervous but unable to help himself. He had no idea he'd just given me the signal to go in for the kill.

"Because I wanted to know… _you_."

His mouth hung open, and I knew I'd had him.

/

"This is amazing." Ichigo said, as she kept pace with Gaara, her hand still on his arm. "You have everything."

Gaara nodded, narrowing his eyes at a familiar figure in the distance. "We try. We usually have only two a year. Your coming here has changed that a bit." Was that…Rinmaru?

"Oh," Ichigo let out a surprised gasp, "I'm so sorry."

At her change in tone, Gaara looked over to her, "No need to apologize. I'm actually glad the two of you did come. I can tell it really made everyone in the village happy to be a part of this. I'm grateful."

"Thank you, Lord Kazekage." Ichigo said, meekly dropping her gaze, her face pink.

He glanced over at her in concern, "Are you sure you're feeling alright? You're turning pink. It's not particularly hot tonight…you must be coming down with something—"

"No!" Ichigo exclaimed, "I'm fine. I just…"

He waited for her to finish but once she trailed off, she left it at that. It was quiet between them again. Rinmaru, his brother and sister had left them almost forty minutes ago. Gaara had stopped to talk with one of his shinobi named Kaito Yoshino, his wife and his one-year old daughter. The toddler wouldn't let Gaara leave until she'd pulled his hair at least once, after he'd held her of course. After that, the couple had apologized for several minutes and Gaara assured them that no harm was done. When they'd finally parted, Gaara looked around and the three had disappeared.

He knew Rinmaru had said that he should spend time with Ichigo, but despite discovering that she was both a sweet and kind girl, he came to the conclusion that for whatever reason…she wouldn't be giving him advice anytime soon. She became flustered when he complimented her, and he could tell that hanging onto him as she did wasn't helping matters.

Admittedly, it was flattering to have someone like Ichigo like him so much but…that he was used to. He'd much rather be able to engage her in conversation—

"Rinmaru." Ichigo chuckled, and pointed to the strawberry haired girl to their left. She laughed gaily, surrounded on all sides by seven men. Two of the men wore solemn expressions and stood farther back while the other five tried to catch and keep her attention. She was on the arm of a bench, listening as Shoto, a ninja Gaara had seen with Kankuro many times, told her a story. The others listened as well. Some of them were actually listening, the others, Gaara could tell, were bidding their time until they could interrupt. "She's incorrigible."

Gaara found himself smirking, "I guess she wasn't lying when she said she preferred her men the way she preferred her enemies…"

"'In large groups, ripe for the picking!'" Ichigo exclaimed, imitating Rinmaru's mannerisms as she said it, finishing it off with a wink. "She never lies when it comes to flirting. She's become something of a professional—so infamous, most ninja in our village know better than to take anything she says seriously."

"She's never meant any of it?"

"Never. It's never been more than a game to her." Ichigo was grinning now, her eyes alive as she observed her friend. "I've gotten some of her special moves down to a science. See here—" Ichigo motioned to how she was sitting, "She's presenting herself as a prize. There's elevation here, sitting differently than the men around her. She's holding herself in a way that invites others to look…but not touch. Her legs are crossed but her skirt is draped in a way that hides her legs—letting them know that she's no floosie. If they want to win her, they have to come as gentlemen. I'd even be willing to bet that she hasn't so much as grazed one of their arms. She probably spotted these men when we first arrived, observed them a bit—tried to reveal bits of their character—before making her approach."

Gaara furrowed his brow, "That seems so unlike her," and yet it also didn't. When they had entered the dressmaker's store, Rinmaru knew exactly how she would approach Nanao. Some of it had to premeditated, but it seems so…reckless…so whimsical. So…

"It's rare for Rinmaru to do anything without a purpose or plan," Ichigo said, nodding at the girl in question as she peered their way. "If she does…her target must be very beautiful."

The wind suddenly picked up around them, causing Ichigo to exclaim as she leaned further into Gaara. Rinmaru on the other hand seemed to relish it. She lifted her arms as the wind blew around her, whipping her hair around. She closed her eyes, and turned her head. When she opened them, her striking eyes met Gaara's nailing him to his spot. But instead of reprimanding him, she smirked and stared back at him, not breaking contact even as the wind pushed and pulled her hair.

She continued to smirk at him until the urge to look away from her left Gaara. In moments, he returned the look with a small smile of his own. She seemed pleased and he couldn't say that he wasn't either. In a way they were both caught, a secret shared between them—

One of her consorts called her name, she blinked, and the spell was broken. Rinmaru turned away from him and continued her game of cat and mouse. But he continued to watch her all the same.

/

The crowd around me had grown to include both women and children, and not a moment too soon either. I'd been given my love confessions and wanted nothing more to do with these men. They were pleasant…but boring. The women were more interesting and the children were even more so, hilarious. I used them as an excuse to escape, but my little harem found me anyway.

"Lady Rinmaru!" Kota said, freckled faced with red blotchy skin. I had a feeling he had a crush on me. "Look at me!"

He threw a ball at a bunch of bottles stacked on top of each other and succeeded in knocking the load down…save for one. He frowned, and crossed his arms, disappointed.

I waved a few quick signs with my right hand (blocked from view) and watched as a gust of wind blew it down.

"Yes!" Kota punched the air, his hair falling into his bright dark eyes. "I won you a tiger, Lady Rinmaru!"

The vendor scratched his grey beard, "That sure was a crazy wind just now."

"Was it?" I asked, "I didn't feel any wind."

The vendor frowned, questioning himself, "Well…I suppose I didn't feel anything either. Must be the rheumatism."

I grabbed his eyes, and held them, "Perhaps a storm is coming? I wouldn't put it past a wise man like yourself to know such things."

The man folded his arms, straightening his back as he did, "Yes. Well, it wouldn't be the first time. These old bones don't lie…"

"I'm sure." I said, and pointed at the red stuffed tiger, "We'll take that one."

/

Kota, Genkai, Ran, Yuma, Ichiro, Sosuke, and Asa comprised my new cohort. All of them walked closely beside me, squeezing out any other pursuer with ease. The boys were sweet, grinning to get my attention, and the little girls were cute, cunning little things. The men that managed to sneak by a child would be met with one of their smiles and an order, "Lady Rinmaru really wants some candy." And like the suitors they claimed to be they would scramble away at a run to retrieve that special treat for me. Asa was the one who had started this little game, and I, of course, did nothing to discourage it. I didn't let it on, but she was quickly becoming my favorite.

I'd met the little diva after I ditched my harem the first time. She was all alone, arms crossed but with a distinctly noble air about her. She was a pampered girl, her clothing extravagant and her eyes ever watchful. She had dark, rust colored hair that instantly reminded me of my aunt. But her eyes, despite their color, I could see were just like mine.

"You're Lady Rinmaru, aren't you?"

"Yes. And who are you, beautiful?" I said squatting down to her level.

"Asa." She said, her cheeks pinkening at my compliment.

"Are you with someone?" I decided that asking "are you lost" would instantly throw her into a rage, she would deny it and march off like she knew exactly where she was going. She would get lost, land herself in a few fights too. It was something I would do as a child.

She shrugged, "Not anymore."

"I see."

"You know something?" the little girl stepped closer until she had to tilt her head to match my eyes.

"What?"

"My mother hates women like you."

I threw my head back laughing, tears pricking my eyes. I was pleased to see that the little girl didn't look displeased by my reaction. Her eyes were bright, alive. "Is that right? Why is that?"

"She says you're attention whores."

Again I barely suppressed my laugh, but straightened my features, my eyes boring into hers. "And what do _you_ think?"

Her answer was instantaneous, following close behind a wide grin, "I think you're funny."

I grinned, brushing her hair with my fingers. "Well, I think you're funny too, but let's not let other people hear you say the word whore okay?"

"Why not?"

"Some people don't like it." I said with a shrug, "But me? I couldn't care less."

I looked down at her beside me now, as her hand held on to mine possessively. Marriage had never been a part of a future I thirsted for but for a little girl like her…it would almost be worth it.

/

Gaara quite enjoyed the quiet. It was nice and seldom uncomfortable for him. The silence he shared with Ichigo wasn't uncomfortable, it was awkward but not uncomfortable. After Rinmaru had disappeared, the two of them had discussed her and her antics until there was nothing left to say. They had actually worn the subject through to the bone. Even now, he was tempted to bring her up again just to see Ichigo's face light but, even more so, he wanted to know more about the Rinmaru Ichigo had unwittingly revealed to him. Gaara chastised himself for it, even though, truly, he didn't know why he did that either.

Gaara was no brilliant conversationalist unless they were discussing war or politics. He figured neither subject were appropriate though. That left him with few options….

 _Oh, what the hell…_ Gaara sighed deeply, "I was wondering about something you mentioned about Rinmaru—"

Ichigo suddenly let out a laugh, "This is just like Rinmaru. Even when she isn't here…she's here."

Gaara didn't respond. He couldn't be sure the girl was even speaking to him and knew it would probably be a bad idea to offer any more insight into her comment.

Gaara was slowly getting annoyed—not at Ichigo—but at his brother and Rinmaru, of course. This was supposed to be easy! This was supposed to be simple! Something even he could accomplish with little to no effort. _Damnit._ She seemed so outgoing when he'd met her on the battlefield and again at the village gates. Why was the only thing they could possibly have in common is the one person—

There was suddenly a whizzing through the air. Gaara looked to his left, "Paper bomb—"

He grabbed onto Ichigo and the two of them were incased in sand as the debris blasted all around them.

/

It was almost a blessing. Almost. But…unfortunately women and children screaming did nothing but put a damper on my love for battle.

Asa tugged on my hand, "What should we do?"

Her eyes were bright things, fierce. This little girl didn't understand anything beyond her own temper. She'd get herself killed one day if she kept that up.

"Simple." I weaved my hand signs, giving the group of fierce and frightened children a wink. "Nothing. What is it? Six of you?"

Asa narrowed her eyes at me and nodded. "Yes. Why do you—"

"Almost to ten then!"

My portal appeared beneath them and they had little time to scream before they found themselves transported away. It was a good thing too, because at that moment a barge of kunai speared down from the sky. I'd put the number close to a hundred, many of them, undoubtedly hard to see in the falling darkness. The screams told me that although these people could see them, many of these villagers didn't seem to have the means or faculties to run away.

I opened another damnable portal. The screaming ceased only to be replaced by shock.

"Well?" I shouted, "Aren't you going to run?"

One man wearing a dark blue tunic pulled himself from the dirt and began barreling in the opposite direction of the fighting. Good for him. After seeing this brazen fellow, the rest of the group followed. The group was dense, I'd put the number closer to sixty. It was strange how slow people seemed to move when they had every possible reason to run like the gates of hell were falling from the sky.

I followed after them, opening portal after portal, transporting these people to the other side of the village to a bunker I knew existed from my late night "stroll". I pray it's in commission. If it's not… well…always the thought that counts.

I turned and darted down a side street. In the distance I could see waves of sand roll over and around buildings, dancing fiercely with an assailant.

Gaara.

I scaled the first building I came to and began jumping and diving from roof to roof. He was closer now, near the village walls but high in the sky suspended by a small circle of sand. It almost looked like he stood on nothing. I opened my mouth and found that even I couldn't think of something clever to say to myself.

His hair was a storm of red around him, his arms barely moving as the sand hunted it's target. The man was swift though, keeping just near the city to make Gaara pause. There were suddenly two other shadows advancing, the ones that had undoubtedly attacked the city. I moved to take them but the sand was faster. It swarmed around them, enfolding them in enough sand to bury them alive five times over.

There was a movement with Gaara's hand and a muffled scream as the sand suddenly tightened destroying its contents in mere moments. Ruthless.

The man leaping around barely glanced at his fallen comrades. But shuddered all the same as sand took them. I let my hands weave me up and into the air. I was behind him now. And I placed my cold fingers against his neck. He jerked back into me and I stepped back landing on the roof beneath us. He landed as well, but unfortunately for him he began to sink speedily into the ceiling.

"What the hell is this?" the dark blue haired man shouted.

"It's what we in the mist village like to call a trap, my good friend." I said swaggering up to the man, who had only a head left to shout with.

"Where's the rest of me?" he screamed. I couldn't possibly attempt to recreate the terror on his face. It was beautiful, marred by his dirty face. "It…feels like I'm standing in nothing."

The rest of him must be in the sky somewhere. I even impressed myself sometimes.

I didn't dare look up though, best to keep him confused. Ninja's were always less effective than they would like to think when they were confused. The same is true for lovestruck men.

I could hear Gaara descending behind me.

"Where's Ichigo?" I asked, smiling at our dear insurgent.

"She, Kankuro and Temari were evacuating the villagers. I left to handle this…" Gaara frowned at the being before us. "I didn't expect to find you here."

"I thought I'd get that debt out of the way."

"I see you have your priorities." Gaara replied monotonously.

"Don't be jealous just because I have nothing to confuse," I replied lazily. I pointed my finger at the assailant. "Now, tell me…what's your name?"

His darting eyes seemed to finally fall on me. His eyes were wide, but they began to slack. His lids beginning to close shut. "Death…" he sputtered out, "Death to the Sand Village…long live the Mist…"

/

My eyes snapped open and my body ran still. I didn't bother glancing at Gaara. I did listen though, I listened for anything that signaled an impending attack. The two of us stood in silence.

I was almost disappointed. Gaara had a way of making you hate him. If our positions had been switched, the moment I heard those words I would have attacked without question. Unflinchingly.

I rolled my eyes and cracked my neck. He knew how to piss me off, didn't he?

"That was easy." I said, taking steps toward him.

"It was supposed to be." Gaara said, flicking something toward me to catch. I snapped it up with two fingers and flipped it over. It was a single card with a joker on the front, divided around the waist. It showed two faces laughing. "Someone's trying to start a war."

He crossed his arms and peered down at the man tucked deeply in the genjutsu.

I stomped my foot, knowing full well it meant I'd be trapped here for another week or so. "Well, fuck me."

Gaara gave me an appraising look but he cracked a smile and then looked away.

Irked, I watched him kneel next to the insurgent before looking him over as well (what he could look over anyway). He glanced back at me.

I rolled my eyes, weaved a hand sign and walked up to the insurgent, grabbed him by the hair and pulled him out of the roof.

"Impressive," Gaara remarked, staring at the spot the ninja had been, "Your power is reminiscent of the Rinnegan or the Sharingan, but it's also so versatile."

I lifted my hands, "What can I say? I'm a boss, deal with it."

Shaking his head, Gaara encased the man in sand, leaving only his face free for him to breathe. "After we account for the villagers, we should question him."

I nodded at his back, knowing full well he couldn't see me.

"I guess it would be a bad time to ask how things went with Ichigo?" I said tapping his shoulder to get him to turn and face me, "Did you talk about me the _whole_ time or just for the time you were watching me?"

/

 **Author's Note:** Hello, lovelies! I appreciate your guys' patience. Please ignore any future dates I put up, I always overestimate how much time I'll have to finish a chapter. In truth I began this chapter immediately after I posted the last, but I wasn't able to finish this off until recently. I'm posting these chapters as I finish them so they may have a few errors here and there. When I reach chapter five, I plan to go through and fix all errors. I want to finish this story in ten chapters, by the end of summer or beginning of winter. I have it all outlined! Let's see if we can make history!


	5. Chapter 5

Disclaimer: I do Not own Naruto.

 **How I Met Your Father**

Chapter 5: Why Can't We Be Friends?

* * *

 _Doesn't have to end...and if it ends...can't we be friends?_

* * *

Gaara hesitated as he turned around, briefly wondering what the appropriate response would be to her question. The simple answer would be to ignore it and return to the topic at hand. His village was attacked, after all, it made absolutely no sense to even t _hink_ about playing her little game. He _was_ the Kazekage…right? If there were any games to be played, he would be in control of the board. It was the law of the world. But…

He could also point out that he had no choice in the matter, seeing as he and the indigo haired kunoichi had very few things to say to each other that didn't revolve around the strawberry blonde girl. But that…that was troublesome too. He didn't know why…it just was. He knew the moment he began, he'd feel terrible getting it out. And not for Ichigo's sake either…which is probably another reason why he felt terrible saying it.

So instead he settled for, "I don't know what you mean."

For a moment she just looked at him and then…after what felt like years to Gaara, Rinmaru began to laugh. Not the cute coy laugh he could safely expect from Miharu or Ichigo, it was the kind of laugh that let the hearer know that there was nothing in the world funnier than what just transpired. The kind of laugh that required you to have absolutely no restraint or empathy for your audience. It was completely self-serving and somewhat spiteful, if not slightly venomous. Gaara found that this laugh was most common amongst the unstable and bloodthirsty…he would know.

After a moment or two of watching Rinmaru struggle to keep on her feet, Gaara spoke, "I don't see what's so funny. Care to enlighten me?"

"You…" she gasped for breath, attempting to stand straight up, but her left knee kept wobbling, jerking inward. "You don't listen, do you?"

Gaara narrowed his eyes as Rinmaru swallowed roughly and wiped tears from the corner of her eyes.

"Well," she shrugged, with a sniffle. "I'm not going to repeat myself."

He sighed with exhaustion, "Rinmaru."

"Is that bunker in commission by the way?" she asked randomly, with both hands on her hips, her head tilted slightly.

Gaara was silent a moment. "Which one?"

Rinmaru gave him a disbelieving look, "You know which one. We don't need to pretend that you weren't having me followed Gaara, you would've hurt my feelings if you hadn't even bothered."

 _So, you knew, huh?_ After a pause, Gaara spoke, "Why do you ask?"

Rinmaru just smiled, "If I _accidently_ killed over two-hundred of your villagers…that wouldn't really make us square now, would it?"

/

"Let me at her! Let me—let go of me, peasant!"

I squatted down to the children's level as three of the boys tried their hardest to hold little Asa back. "What's this?" I hid my smile with my hand. "You sound upset."

"I sound upset?" Asa repeated, her little voice cracking two octaves. "Upset? I'll show you upset, come here!"

Ichigo stood beside me and shook her head disapprovingly. "Why am I not surprised?"

"Was I supposed to _not_ send them somewhere safe and away from danger?" I asked quietly, with a roll of my eyes. Asa was too busy verbally berating me to hear a word we were saying.

"Did you tell them what you were doing?"

I narrowed my eyes with a confused expression. "Why would I do that?"

Ichigo glowered at me until I laughed, "I'm joking, I'm joking. I would have if I had time, Dearest. Not only did I have to open a portal for them but then I had to immediately teleport over two hundred kunai away from a very confused crowd of people. I made an executive decision. The next time I'm about to save a few lives I'll ask them how they want it done and move forward from there—"

"Rinmaru."

"I know, I know." I sighed and turned away from her to glance back at the children. "You can let her go now."

Kota hesitated, "But—"

"It's okay," I winked at him. "I think I deserve a little beating, don't you think?"

The rest of the boys eased away and released Asa. She was clearly not expecting this because she didn't rush me the moment they dropped her arms. Asa glanced back at them, expecting them to jump in and save me once she moved to strike. Once she felt certain they wouldn't move, Asa turned back to me and spat venomously, "I HATE YOU."

I just smiled at her, "I know."

"You're the worst!" She kicked me as hard as she could. I barely felt a pinch—she knew that too. And I didn't try to be injured for her sake, she'd only take it as an insult. I didn't even acknowledge it.  
"I get that a lot too." I replied with a giggle, "But the kicking? That's new."

"I—I wish I never met you." Asa stuttered, her eyes blinking rapidly.

"I don't hear that one as much…but I've heard it."

"I…" she paused and then swallowed, "I…"

I watched her big eyes, as they stared into mine. Tears gathered. Her brow trembled, as she struggled to keep her angry tears from escaping. As I stared at her, I realized how different we were. This little girl was a wonder in a way I never could be. We'd only known each other for moments, breaths of time really and already…she loved me. She loved me so hard it hurt her to be left out, thrown away like an unwanted child.

I really hated people like this. These people never saw you how you thought you should be seen, and they didn't care if you burned down the world…as long as you loved them.

Those people never lasted very long.

I moved my hands from my lap and let my knees hit the sand. A little crowd of people were gathering around us. Out of the corner of my eye, I spotted Temari. "I know."

Asa bit her lip as her breathing slowed. "You should have said something. You could have killed us!"

"I knew where you were."

Asa shook her head. "You…" she swallowed again, "You didn't have to get rid of us like that."

"Yes, I did. You guys are the bravest little kids I have ever met…but these guys weren't there to test you." I leaned my head back, staring at the stars above. "You may have the heart of a lion, but you are still a nobleman. Being brave doesn't change that."

"Don't you think I know that?" she snapped, crossing her arms. "Why are you smiling?"

"I missed you."

She wrinkled her nose at that, "Well…I didn't miss _you_."

"Okay."

"Okay is right." She said haughtily, jabbing a tiny finger at meme.

After a while I opened my arms, "Forgive me?"

Her bottom lip trembled, and she started forward but stopped short, "On one condition."

I let her continue.

"You have to promise to teach me to fight like you and…you can never do that again, understand? Never."

Oh, I'd do it again. And a thousand times over too and I doubt I'd ever live to regret it. Not once. But… she was young, she still couldn't quite tell when she was being lied to. "Deal."

With that, she grinned and rushed me, collapsing into my lap with a giggle. A moment later the boys joined in, and the other kids came too, pulling away from their worried parents. One at a time, I hugged them and swung them around, but Asa didn't let anyone keep me for too long.

Laughing, I stood up and caught Gaara staring at me. I took a deep breath and let it out, sticking my tongue out at him. He probably didn't realize it…but he was smiling again.

I stared back, biting down on my answering smile. _What a dumb dork._

/

Ichigo stood to her feet on top of the bed to leer down at me. "You snuck around the village at night?"

I licked my lips and smiled innocently, "I wouldn't call it sneaking…"

"What else would it be!"

"Research."

"For what? A 'How to Destabilize a Village in Ten Days' guidebook?"

"No," I paused and furrowed my brow, "But…now that you mention it…"

"Incorrigible rogue!" Ichigo threw her arms around as she marched back and forth on the bed. I swear, it was like she was an old maid or something.

"Why do you always sound so scandalized?" I asked balancing upside down on one hand, feet kicking into the air. "Honestly, you really shouldn't even be surprised."

"I shouldn't?" Ichigo shouted back her cute little cheeks pinkening with rage.

"Not in the least," I then added cheekily. "It's like you don't even know me."

Ichigo let out a squeal of revulsion. " _WHAT_?"

"Ichigo…" I cooed calmly, "You're speaking in all caps again. We talked about this."

"Argh! Why are we even friends?" she threw herself back on my borrowed bed and covered her face with her hands. Trying not to laugh, I flipped back onto my feet and made my way to the bed to stand over her and try and peek through her fingers. She did this when we were kids too. Everything stressed her out back then. I'm so proud of her now…she's taking this so well.

"Because Ichimaru sounds like a badass."

After a moment's pause, she dropped her hands and looked at me like a very stressed-out parent. I had to bite down on my lip to keep from bursting out with a laugh. "Just promise me you won't do it again."

"Whatever you want, Dearest."

"Are you lying?"

"Whatever you want."

She closed her eyes with a sigh, a smile creeping onto her lips, "Okay, Ringo."

Oh, she knew me.

"Also, there's one more thing." Ichigo sat up and nailed me with a serious expression, her brows drawn together.

I raised an eyebrow. "Yes, beautiful?"

Ichigo pressed her lips and then looked away from me sheepishly.

I frowned, "Oh no, not again."

She nodded and then started to play with her long braid.

My eyes widened, "No."

"Lord Kazekage…he…well…"

"Don't speak."

She peeked at me with a single eye, slightly nervous to deliver the final blow, "He saved me."

I slapped my hands over my face and collapsed onto my bed like the world was ending.

/

Gaara was exhausted and it was barely noon. The meeting with the Elders had gone as expected. They were worried but indignant and positive that they'd find a solution to their problems. He would…he had no choice but still he wished he hand their confidence.

After the war, the elders had all changed a little. They weren't as cagey as they had been. They had become more easy going, a bit more compassionate. Gaara owed this all to that man, the man who had saved his own life and the world he had grown to love so well…

Still despite this there were still problems, still things to sort through, not enough time. And of course, there was Rinmaru who had been surprisingly silent throughout the entire meeting despite the gravity of the situation. She had almost seemed surly and pouty, more so than he had ever seen her…or rather it was the first time he had ever seen her that way at all. It was a bit unsettling, foretelling something he assumed, something thing he—

Gaara paused in the middle of the corridor, the warm lights shining overhead. To his left he could peer out of the little round windows and see his village below, bustling, rebuilding, thriving, working through the attack. If he had time today, he'd try and see if he could lend a hand. It would make them happy.

"You wanted to speak to me?" Gaara said as the figure rounded the corner behind him.

Rinmaru's shoes clicked against floor as she approached him. Her rhythm had become almost too familiar to him, he could pick it out from among millions…but in all fairness, he was the Kazekage.

"Was I so obvious?" she seemed to almost sigh the words. "I must be losing my touch."

He turned to face her and was met with her familiar gaze. It was different somehow, serious, unsettling. "No. I just assumed that because you were following me."

Rinmaru paused and leaned against the wall on her right, her arms crossed beneath her chest. "Right."

Gaara waited a moment, then two…still she didn't speak. Gaara was no stranger to silence, he coveted sometimes but…It was strange, this was strange. Gaara even began to count the seconds before she spoke again. He had just gotten to two-hundred and forty when she suddenly lurched forward, throwing her hands up to the sky before falling onto her hands and cartwheeling toward him. He was so shocked his eyes widened at the spectacle before him. She was a bright whirlwind of color swinging around in rhythm.

"I have a solution!" Rinmaru landed in front of him, her green eyes shocking and vibrant once again filled with their mischief. She leaned toward him, so close he could smell her sweet perfume. "Do you want to know a secret, Lord Gaara?"

He opened his mouth only to close it again.

"Don't answer," she placed a finger against her lips and leaned backwards, her right hand slipping into his before she walked backwards, pulling him along. "You don't really have a choice in the matter, Lord Kazekage."

/

"You wanted me here…" Gaara glanced around, eyed his desk before looking back at her. "In my office…in my home?"

"You shouldn't talk like that Gaara," Rinmaru floated over him and sat on his desk, picking up pictures and the like before settling them down again. "What if someone overheard you?"

Gaara raised in eyebrow, trying, and failing to find the problem with his words.

But Rinmaru only laughed, throwing her head back as she did, "You're so cute."

Embarrassed, Gaara turned toward the door, "What did you need? I'm assuming it's important—"

"You assume right! It's probably one of the most important things you've talked about all day—no, it is the most important thing you'll ever have to talk about until the day you die." She talked with her hands as she said this illustrating it's magnitude with her delicate fingers—not that he thought they were delicate.

Gaara's serious expression deepened.

"Well…" she smiled slyly, "I may have exaggerated a bit."

"The point, please."

"The point? I thought we were already there." She placed a hand on his shoulder and leaned into his shoulder. "We're here to talk about us, of course."

"Us?"

Rinmaru nodded, closing the distance. "Us."

Gaara's heart began to beat out of its mind, his face burning like he stood facing a million suns—

Rinmaru fell back on his desk with a laugh.

Gaara gritted his teeth, trying not to show the irritation in his face.

"Sorry…that was the last time…" she said between laughs. "I swear. I just needed to see your face. Who would have known you could turn that shade of red, Gaara?"

Gaara waited for the giggling to subside. He was embarrassed but relieved she could still laugh like this. He was starting to worry if something had changed between them.

Clearing her throat Rinmaru straightened up. "On a serious note, I'm here to thank you. And most importantly I'm here to settle my debt."

"You have no debt with me."

"Oh, but I do." Rinmaru went on. "You've saved Ichigo twice now and that alone in debts me to you."

"You helped saved over two hundred of my villagers last night, if there was any debt at all it was repaid last night ten times over—"

"Gaara…" she looked up at him from beneath those long dark eyelashes of hers, "do you want me to be brutally honest?"

"Aren't you usually?"

She wagged a finger at him, "No one likes a smart-ass, Gaara."

"Anyway," she continued, moving away from him to peer out of the window. "By my calculations I still owe you a thousand or so lives. A number I am simply unable to match (anytime soon anyway). So that leaves only one option…"

Gaara felt a number of emotions in that moment: annoyance, incredulity, shock and…sadness.

"We have to be friends. There's no other way around it." She shook her head with a frown, giving Gaara the impression that she had, in fact, attempted to get around it. "None at all."

"Does she mean so much to you?"

"You mean more than a handful of your villagers? Of course. I thought that was obvious." She looked at him like he was the silly one. Still, he flinched at her delivery, the way she so callously dismissed their lives even after they had welcomed her so willingly. Did their love mean nothing? He breathed in deeply, eyeing her calm resolve. She looked like she didn't even realize how her words sounded or how they could be taken, or worse yet, she looked like she didn't care. Was this a person he should allow himself to be friends with?

"So…what do you say?" Moving with her usual sashaying and gliding, she moved toward him, meeting his gaze. "Do you want to be my friend, Gaara?"

He hesitated a moment before extending his hand because if anyone could possibly understand how her mind works it would be him, and failing that, the least he could do was show her that other people, even those she had yet to meet, are worthy of love and respect. "I do."

"Good…" she eyed the hand like it hand a thousand thumbs, "First things first… _never_ do that again."

"Why?"

"We're friends aren't we, why the hell would we shake hands?"

"It's a common greeting among friends and acquaintances. People do it all the time."

"Whoever told you that was a liar. Everyone knows shaking hands is reserved only for enemies and grabby old men."

"…." He wondered briefly if she believed her own rules or if these were things she made up just for him.

"You didn't know, did you?" She cooed sweetly, "Don't worry. I'll teach you. I'll teach you everything." That statement alone sent chills down his spine, most of them, he guessed, sprung from fear, the others—

"Rinmaru?"

She grinned, "Yes, Dearest?"

He closed his eyes, tired, "Do you always say things like that?"

"To my friends. Why…do they bother you?"

He didn't have to look at her face to know she was wearing a self-satisfied smile, "I doubt I need to answer that."

* * *

 **Author's Note:** I apologize in advance for the length of this chapter. It's much shorter than the last but I had outlined too much for this chapter and if I don't cut it here, it will take me forever to complete. Thank you to my loyal reviewers, I have a plan for all characters mentioned and a few throw-away phrases here and there. Everything will make sense when it finishes.

Also, I'm pushing the story to end in six more chapters. I wanted an even ten but with all that needs to happen ten sounded a little too compressed. This romance has to be believable doesn't it? Ten is not enough (for me anyway). At the most I'll do fifteen, but I hope not. I'm sorry I took so long to get back to this story. I was in France for a while but that's still not an excuse. Thanks for bearing with me guys. Happy New Year! See you in January!


	6. Chapter 6

Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto, just my characters and their history.

 **How I Met Your Father**

Chapter 6: Mission One

* * *

 _I'm-a put this on… when he see me in this dress I'm-a get me some—hey!_

* * *

"I don't like this."

"I know."

"I don't like the idea of leaving you—"

"Aw!"

" _Here_ of _all_ places."

"Well that's nice…" I replied with a middle finger.

Ichigo sighed into my pillow. "I suppose there's no way around it."

"None at all, let my aunt tell it."

"So, you spoke to her?"

I giggled.

"The usual way?"

The giggle turned to straight up laughter.

"With…Lord Kazekage present?"

I clutched my stomach as the laughing began to squeeze me to pieces. Shooting me a look, Ichigo leaned over and wacked my arm. I couldn't stop though. It was already too much.

"I don't know if I should be proud…or worried."

I managed to calm myself and cleared my throat, sitting up as I did. "Honestly, Ichigo, you're starting to hurt my feelings…it's like you don't trust me."

Ichigo observed me quietly, resting her head on her hand as she stared. "Would you trust you?"

Without giving it much thought, I placed my forehead against hers, our own private goodbye, and spoke softly, "I'd trust you."

With a smile she replied, "Sadly…that's not good enough."

"Just trust me…" I fell back onto my pillow and stared up at the ceiling with a slight smile. "I no longer have a real reason to misbehave."

/

I stood at the village gates at three o'clock the next morning, watching as Ichigo and her escort trudged off through the sand and out of sight. It would be a while before we saw each other again. I think the longest we'd ever gone was three weeks. Now I was looking at a couple months, here, stuck in the Sand. Those Sand-Terrorists—my nickname for them—were few in number but radical and bloodthirsty. Finding them would be like trying to find a senbon needle in a haystack (if you can excuse the cliché).

I sighed heavily, and placed a hand over my eyes to watch the last of their retreat. It was hard to see, but I still could feel her chakra steadily floating away from me…

Oh, sentimentality! I swung my hands into the air and stamped down on the sand, hating the way it rushed immediately to replenish itself. Sand was like water in that way, but it was also nothing like it, which only made me hate it more.

With a shrug, I tossed my hair over my shoulders and began walking back toward the village.

"You sure you don't want to wait?" Temari called to me, now at my left.

"No," I said holding my head high again, "the faster we finish this the better."

"Glad to hear it." Temari replied in that cool tone of hers, flashing me those pretty teal eyes.

I grinned at her, "I think I may just love you."

/

Three days passed. The village for the most part wasn't nearly as damaged as it could have been—thanks in part to yours truly (you're welcome). But it didn't necessarily please me to see the occasional shop completely caved in, a family waiting for the go ahead to rebuild. All had been given shelter, if they needed it, but some homes and shops were still stuck in the "do not cross this line" section. The Sand village had never been pretty to me, in fact, I've always found it quite fugly, but…this…it irritated me. Not enough to scream or to be angry but… _enough._ I appreciated a good kill as well as the other ninja but…this seemed sadder somehow or Gaara and all his melancholy was finally wearing me down. Either way… _._

I shivered.

Gaara paused beside me to assess the damage to a small home. He kneeled down on the ground, looking up at the one unbroken window, mourning undoubtedly. Cue eye roll.

I crossed my arms and walked away, peering at the ground for anything more than the handful of cards stabbed into the dirt. We'd found several of those in various places around the village. They were everywhere. Every now and then a ninja would show up and tell Gaara the location of more of them. It was growing tedious, so tedious I'd walked into my borrowed room and tossed my own cards in the trash. I could no longer stand the sight of them. Gaara on the other hand, couldn't seem to get enough of them. He had the ninja meticulously make a map of where they had found them. And as more reports came, the look in Gaara's eyes only grew.

It was obvious to anyone—any onlooker with enough sense. Gaara didn't have to pause after his eyes raked over the map and announce to us all, "With these cards," he began voice all scratchy, deep. "they've outlined our entire village. They've invaded us."

I could have told him that. It was obvious the night of the festival. If they had only _just_ invaded us, someone would have noticed. Border patrol that night was the highest it had been in weeks (I don't think you need to ask why I knew that). An assault may not have been impossible, but it probably would have been a bit more difficult than it was. That left the question of the who and of course…the where.

I stopped by a stand I frequented that night. It sold taiyaki in multiple flavors and the kids loved it, grinning up at me as I handed them out. Had I felt anything strange that night? No. The people around me reminded me of home…perhaps too much of home.

Or I was being paranoid, which isn't as likely as you'd think. I'm untrusting but never paranoid.

"Have you found any more?" Gaara almost startled me. He surprised me sometimes, it was only when he was like this, in full Kazekage form when he could completely catch me off guard. I shouldn't have to tell you it both impressed me and made me hate him.

"No, but it has been three days now. The more we search the less likely we'll be able to find something substantial."

Gaara only looked at me, as he usually did when he wanted me to continue talking. We'd spent way too much time together these last few days. He seemed to have taken that 'we're friends' thing way too seriously, giving me looks and expecting me to know what the hell they meant. He should be lucky I knew half of them. _What a dork._

Despite myself, I elaborated, "If we look too hard, we'll just look over it or become overly analytical—I'm not sure which is worse. My advice would be to either let your people go back to their homes or bring in new eyes. Maybe that Leaf Village could assist with their clever little visual prowess…I'm sure since all of us are allies it wouldn't hurt anything, but our pride."

Gaara laughed (I swear it sounded like sandpaper trying to catch fire), "You're right, but still…I wouldn't want to involve them just yet. This group has only been threatening the Sand."

"And by claiming ties to the Mist," I stretched my hands above my head, watching as Gaara kept his eyes on mine. "It threatens us as well."

"Agreed."

With that and the sun above us beginning to drop, I suggested we return to the mansion. We walked in relative silence, neither of us bothering to hasten our speed. Gaara watched the buildings we passed solemnly, his lips tight and his non-existent brow drawn.

He could be a bit of a downer sometimes, kind of like Chojuro.

I was taller than him; I realized suddenly as I watched Gaara gaze at the buildings around us. I was taller, but somehow he felt bigger—the way my aunt felt when we'd walk together…

I laughed, dismissing the thought, naïve people often had a way of puffing themselves up. It was silly to me, but no less endearing.

"Is something wrong?" Gaara asked, noticing finally that I watched him.

"No." I replied, pulling my hand back the moment I'd realized I had raised it to touch him. Bad habits, am I right? "Only you."

"Well," He blinked, seemingly caught between confusion and amusement. "Forgive me."

I shrugged, folding my hands behind my neck, "Don't apologize." I closed my eyes briefly before opening them again to look right at him. I frowned slightly, almost disappointed… he was small again, unsure. "I like it."

/

Every ninja deserves a vacation. Unfortunately, that didn't always apply to ninja in foreign nations.

"I think I've waited enough, Big Sister." Asa declared after we'd walked five minutes away from the mansion. She'd been silent with me until now. Only Sosuke and Ran spoke to me, chattering away as they led me around and I bought them things (mostly candy or clothes). Ichiro was there too but he was shy, only sneaking glances at me when he could bare it, blushing madly as he did so or stuttering. The other children had various chores to attend to but these three vowed to keep me thoroughly entertained. I didn't doubt it. During the investigation, I saw very little of them but now that I had time, they were excited to remedy that.

"Is that a fact?" I responded, smiling brightly. I kept my tone light, a contrast to the strong authoritative tone she was taking with me. I think her beginning silence was supposed to be some kind of negotiation tactic. I didn't have the heart to tell her that that tactic generally didn't work on me. If I tried to fill the silence, I usually did it for the sake of others. Silence didn't bother me; besides, I rather enjoyed the sound of my own thoughts. More often than not, I made myself laugh.

I giggled.

See?

"Yes." She replied, raising her head as the others ran around us in a circle. "Yes it is."

The villagers we passed greeted me with smiles and 'Lady Rinmaru!'s' all around. I winked and waved, smiling brilliantly, looking every bit the benevolent noble I was raised to be—one of the many reasons I favored children other than their hilarious inability to show restraint or tact.

Asa was trying though. She was trying to present herself as my equal. She was cute, but if we were _truly_ equals she wouldn't have to try so hard.

I had so much to teach her.

I paused before looking down at her, making her stop short abruptly. She spun and immediately raised her finger to admonish me, her pretty rust colored hair breaking free of its diamond ornaments, swinging in the slight wind that rustled our clothes. She halted in her tracks, however, open-mouthed. The anbu following us paused too, to see what the fuss was all about.

I wondered if I should show her the difference between us—the wide gap mere wanting could never fully close. But, when I looked at her eyes, all wide and shining, I knew then that there was no desire to close that gap. Only, she just wanted to be near me— _like_ me. That was a terrible idea but…

I chuckled, taking her little fingers into mine and kneeling before her. "Who am I to disappoint?"

/

Rinmaru had come to him that week and asked if she could use the Sand training grounds whenever they were not being used. Gaara did her one better and offered the training studio his family owned near the mansion. One of her trainees was of the nobility and her anbu guard would probably rest easier if they were near him. they'd been using them for two days before Gaara decided to pay them a visit. He didn't know why though, he was walking home from a meeting when he decided to take a left instead of a right and ended up right outside their door.

"Nice try, Ran." Rinmaru's voice floated back to him as he slowly opened the double doors. "Sosuke you too, but don't close your eyes—ever. You need to watch your enemy at all times."

"The way those happy men watch you?" This Sosuke seemed to ask.

"Exactly! Who's my little genius? Come here," she said excitedly. Gaara watched as she pulled the boy into a hug and swung him around. "Now go rest. Who's next? Or are we all tuckered out for the day?"

"Never!" the group shouted back.

"Alright, alright." Rinmaru faced away from him, talking to the kids seated on stands to the left. "You win, but I think a small break is in order, besides…" her head turned in Gaara's direction, "Your Lord Kazekage has decided to pay us a visit."

Gaara guessed there was no avoiding it. He continued forward until he was a few feet away from Rinmaru and her army of children waiting in the stands. The number had doubled since the last time he saw them. He expected as much, for some strange reason, for all of her playacting the love she had for children was genuine. That much he knew.

"Well," Rinmaru placed her hands on her hips, "What are you waiting for? Say hello."

"Hello, Lord Kazekage!" they greeted and he smiled back at them. One little girl in particular had turned completely pink, overheated no doubt.

"I'm glad you've been putting this training facility to good use," Gaara said as all the children eyed him with starry eyes, whispering excitedly. "Kankuro, Temari and I, haven't had much use for it."

"I'm happy you let me borrow it. Asa has been pestering me about this training since we met." Rinmaru threw a glance at the haughty little girl who stood with her arms crossed, "The other children had too many good manners to try it."

"Hey!" Asa threw herself from the stands and charged Rinmaru with all of her might. Her hair was styled in two pigtails without an ounce of ornamentation, even her clothing was plain. Rinmaru only giggled when the girl reached her, swept her off of her feet and swung her around until Asa started laughing. She wobbled when Rinmaru put her down, blinking to focus. "So," she said after she straightened up, "What brings you here, Lord Kazekage?"

Gaara glanced at Rinmaru, who shrugged back at him. He could tell why Rinmaru talked about her so. "Lady Rinmaru has told me so much about you all, I figured I should come see for myself."

"I see." Asa crossed her arms again, her bright eyes flying between Gaara and Rinmaru. "I was wondering when you'd come, but that's because I assumed the two of you were courting."

Gaara opened his mouth and abruptly closed it again. Rinmaru laughed heartily, taking some of the awkwardness Gaara felt away in a moment. "How did you get that idea?"

Asa shrugged, "You're always with him," she said, "And he's always watching you, if you don't mind my saying so, Lord Kazekage."

Gaara definitely minded, but he definitely didn't respond.

"Lord Kazekage watches everyone, my lovely Asa." Rinmaru said leveling a wink at him. "It's in his job description."

Asa nodded sternly, "Of course," but he could tell by the look in her eye she didn't believe a word of it. "That was my second conclusion."

"He probably came to observe my teaching style," Rinmaru said, "Right, Lord Gaara?"

"Right." He didn't know if that was more true than the first.

"And to fight?" Asa asked, her eyebrows pulling up.

"Not really." Gaara replied, as he schooled his expression. _What are you doing?_

"That's a shame." Asa said, "Because we'd love to see some of our Lady's moves in action against a _worthy_ opponent. As I'm sure you know, a few seven-year-olds hardly measure up."

Rinmaru said nothing, but looked mildly impressed by the girl.

"I'm sure you're all very skilled if Lady Rinmaru has anything to do with it." Gaara responded glancing at her without meaning to. She had her eyes trained on the girl, a small smirk on her lips.

"Still…" Asa continued, "We'd love a demonstration…Lord Kazekage."

It was almost laughable. She was actually trying to trap him. Gaara looked from the girl to her teacher, the same mischievous expression present on both faces. He didn't know who's was more obvious.

"Don't force him, my love." Rinmaru turned her back to him and began walking away, knowing full well he'd follow her with his eyes. "He's very busy."

"He doesn't look busy…or he wouldn't be here, would he?" Asa asked, her voice all sweetness, curious.

"That's a good observation, Love, but…still I'm sure he has something better to do…otherwise why would he disappoint such good, honest, sweet children such as yourselves?" she turned around at that, lifting a hand towards him, the other towards the other children who were all wearing equal expressions of disappointment.

Asa nodded furiously, taking steps toward him. "He wouldn't. Not our, Kazekage."

Gaara fought against a frown.

"Of course…" Rinmaru started toward them again, slow and deliberate. "He could just be afraid for my sake. Wouldn't want me to lose face in front of a few harmless children that adore me so...no. That's not it."

"No," Rinmaru continued, her fingers curled beneath her chin, "I think I know. He's scared to fight me—"

"No, he isn't!" Genkai shouted from the stands, "Our Kazekage is never afraid!"

Rinmaru turned her gaze on him, "Is that so, Lord Kazekage?"

Gaara started, "I—"

"Amazing! I'm glad to hear it. Then you wouldn't mind a little harmless demonstration of your taijutsu? Because we both know you far outstrip me when it comes to ninjutsu. It would be extremely unfair for you to use that sand of yours. It will be an even playing field this way. Yes. Don't you agree?"

He no longer had a choice, had he? "Agreed." Gaara sighed, barely a minute here and she'd already roped him into something.

"Fantastic! Let's take center. Lovelies," her voice cracked like a whip, instantly calling the children to attention, "watch closely. You'll learn something."

"I think they already have." Gaara commented, gaining a wink from the Mist Kunoichi.

She paced away from him and called to her children, stretching her arms out around her.

"Should I be ruthless or kind to your _beloved_ Kazekage?"

Gaara's eyes widened, understanding just what he'd agreed to.

One girl, the one who'd blushed when he offered his hand, spoke up, "Kind, M'lady."

"What say the rest of you?" Rinmaru asked with a particularly venomous glint to her eye. "And don't hold back for his sake, Lord Kazekage won't take this personally."

Those words made him slightly nervous, especially since he couldn't use his ultimate defense. "Lady Rinmaru—"

"Ruthless!" a little boy with forever red skin yelled.

"Show no mercy!" another little girl with short blonde hair said practically jumping.

"Ruthless!" the others barked.

Asa, the girl Gaara knew all too well, narrowed her eyes at him before dragging her thumb roughly across her throat and pointing it down. He looked suddenly at Rinmaru, what was she teaching these children?

Rinmaru gave an ingenuine sigh, "I'm truly sorry, lovely Genkai…you've been out voted." He was beginning to see that pattern of hers: lie, compliment, truth.

With a shrug, she began to slowly circle him. "You want ruthless…you'll have it."

"So…" she spoke to him, smiling like she'd already won. "How do you want it? Fast…or slow?" she pulled at her bottom lip with her teeth, "either way I'm well versed in either."

Gaara avoided her eyes, he'd spent enough time with her now to put two and two together. He almost wished he was still in the dark. Did she truly take pleasure from his embarrassment? "Flirting in the midst of battle? Is nothing beneath you?"

She shrugged easily, moving so that she found his eyes again. "What can I say? I prefer the top but…the bottom isn't _all_ bad."

Gaara _really_ wished she'd stop, he didn't need a mirror to see what color he was turning.

"Lord Kazekage, you really should be used to me by now. We are friends, aren't we?"

"I wonder sometimes." For the first time he noticed how close she had advanced, she was barely five feet away.

"About me?" she asked quickly, laughing girlishly, "Oh I know. Temari tells me … _everything."_

Gaara looked away and suddenly found himself pinned to the cold floor. He could barely remember her hitting him, "You were lying."

She stood over him, smiling. "I thought that was obvious." She shrugged, "I guess not."

"Again," Gaara stood to his feet, accepting cold hand she offered. "that kick was impressive."

Rinmaru only rolled her eyes, backing away. "Let's see if you find it half as impressive at twice the speed."

"I assure you, I can handle it."

"I wonder about that."  
"Don't." Gaara replied dryly.

Rinmaru gasped, covering her mouth with glee. "Oooo, finally! I seem to have unleashed the Spicy Kazekage. What a treat this is!"

He shook his head at her, "Your inability to be serious…is that a talent you value?"

"One of my favorites," she readily replied, winking. "You'd like several of mine, if given the chance."

"So, are we fighting again?" Gaara asked, dropping into a fighting stance. "If so could we fight without your…innuendoes?"

"Look at you, knowing words." Rinmaru eyed him, her brilliant eyes still glowing. Even without her words, he could tell by her look that a battle of taijutsu was not a battle she believed he could win against her even without a handicap. "But if bothers you…" she zipped her lips, throwing the key over to her children. The boy—Kota?—grasped it gladly. Gaara glanced over to them, having forgotten them completely. It was so unlike him.

Suddenly, she looked over to the boy who immediately understood her gesture and threw the invisible key her way. She caught it with a spin and unlocked her mouth. The children giggled at that, earning a deep bow from her. "Are we starting at three or five?"

"Why count at all?"

"Why not?"

"Is your first instinct always to question a question?"

"Why do you care?"

She was doing it again, Gaara realized, her tactics were just altered from before. She wasn't flirting to make him uncomfortable, but she was trying to incite an argument.

He refused to fall for it. He'd play her right back, "Three and Five, are they your favorite numbers? Or are they just relative to the amount of egos you have?"

She ignored the barb, only tilting her head slightly as if impressed, "Actually my favorite number is 2…or 9 depending on the day."

"I find that hard to believe. You'd think it would be 1."

"Ouch." Rinmaru shivered, rubbing her hands against her arms. Her eyes were brighter, more intent on him than he had ever seen them. "Did it just get colder in here?"

"If you're finished, I'd like to begin the match." Gaara couldn't help but feel a little satisfied as he said that, satisfied with her slow clap reaction. He finally felt confident around her, comfortable and it showed. He'd just needed time. He hoped the same would be true for Miharu.

"Trust me," she grinned, refusing to take a fighting stance. "it won't be much of a match."

Gaara saw her move this time, but that was all he saw. A wave of her shiny strawberry blonde hair and he was on the ground.

She stood over him again, her face full of curiosity, "Damn." She said, "I'm either really good or you're…"

"Really bad?" he offered taking her hand.

"I was actually going to say slow." She held her chin between her thumb and forefinger, "Really slow. You may have stood a chance if you used that sand though."

He just looked at her as if that wasn't the most obvious thing in the world.

"Don't give me that look. You can't be good at everything, Lord Kazekage."

"Just call me—"

She inclined her head to the kids, "You forget…we have an audience."

"You didn't seem to mind when you were speaking so inappropriately."

"Please. If you didn't get them at first, I highly doubt they would but I'd hardly count you as a suitable test case."

"Am I the exception then?"

"Always." She threw her head back with a laugh, "You should let me train you, you may even learn something."

"I agree."

"Wait," she placed her hands on her hips, "I was joking."

Gaara suddenly had the urge to talk to the children. "Children," he called to them, immediately garnering their attention, "Should I allow Lady Rinmaru to teach me her taijutsu?"

The kids answered in unison, "Yes!"

Genkai ran up to him, "Yay! We'll get to see you more."

Rinmaru stalked toward him and whispered roughly in his ear, "You're the worst."

"I'm only doing what you would have. I must admit…I enjoy the power you exercise."

"Careful, Gaara," she said dropping her voice low, "I may start to believe you mean that."

"Believe what you will."

She was quiet a moment before she moved forward, erasing the space between them, "Am I imagining things…or are you flirting with me?"

Her words, tied to her proximity immediately threw him off. "I—I don't—"

"Ha!" she laughed, "You've gotten better, Lord Kazekage but not good, never good enough to match me. Nice try though." She began to clap her hands loudly, causing the kids to do it too, only they started to yell and whistle much to his chargrin.

"Everything's a show with you, isn't it?" he asked, tiredly.

"Always."

/

"Is this a good idea?" Kankuro asked a week later as they stood at the gates waiting for Miharu's arrival. "Isn't this dangerous for her?"

"It's not like we have a choice now." Temari muttered through her teeth. "I just don't get why Rinmaru didn't have to get up with us."

"Because she's with her 'kids'." Kankuro laughed. "If she's not on time they show up at the mansion, threatening to drag her out. It's that little one—the noble—she's their leader."

"Oh yes, I remember now." Temari smirked at her younger brother. "Hey, Gaara didn't she rope you into fighting Rinmaru?"

"She tried to goad me." Gaara replied, trying to focus on the conversation.

"Did it work?" Temari asked.

"No." Kankuro shrugged and then clasped Gaara's shoulder, "But it did when Rinmaru tried." He shook his head, "You wouldn't know how brutal she is just by looking at her."

"What does that mean, Kankuro?" Temari asked with a dangerous edge to her voice. "Beautiful women aren't dangerous?"

"No! Not at all—I know better alright," Kankuro recovered quickly, throwing his hands up as if to protect himself, "It's just that…by looking at her, you know, you can't tell. She looks so harmless."

Temari laughed, "That's the trick isn't it? The prettier the deadlier. With a face like that…you never see her coming."

"I see her." Gaara said eyeing the procession approach them from afar. "Miharu."

* * *

Author's Note: Hello lovelies! I'm so grateful for the follows and favorites and I especially love the reviews. I actually take pictures of them and reread them to give myself extra motivation, so if you want me to hurry this story along feel free to drop a review (I'm not bribing you or anything *wink wink*).

On a serious note, I hate myself. I didn't lie when I said I have everything outlined but every chapter has so much in it that I'm having to break them up to make it easier to write. I started this one on December 29th with the hopes of uploading the next day but that didn't happen. I have this huge chunk I skipped and have to come back to because it's less fun than the rest but I needed things to happen…sigh. This is supposed to be a part of the last chapter and the beginning of the next chapter will begin with what I couldn't finish here. Sorry guys, writer's block, plus I'm graduating university soon and its exam week.


	7. Chapter 7

**How I Met Your Father**

Chapter 7: Human Nature

* * *

 _Reaching out…across the nighttime…_

* * *

Temari wrapped a scarf around her shoulders, lavender with tiny golden cherry blossom petals fluttering at its tips, and then glanced back at Gaara. He had his head down, staring at a royal blue kimono with dancing gold dragons stitched into the fabric. "What do you think? It really brings out my eyes, doesn't it?"

"Uhm-Hhm."

"It's different from the color I usually wear—it's brighter."

Gaara glared at the garment, undecided.

"I was thinking about cutting off all of my hair and dying it lavender, you know, so it matches."

"You should do whatever you feel is right." He replied dryly, walking around the piece, thinking a better angle would influence him a bit more. He'd thought with only he and Temari in the boutique it would give him space to think. He was wrong.

"We should have Miharu do the same."

"I'll suggest it to her."

He felt Temari's approach, of course he did, but he didn't bother to glance up. He needed to make this decision now—this very moment—or he never would.

"You're clearly distracted." Temari said, placing a hand on his right shoulder. He blinked twice, and she smiled at him, it was like he was waking up from a daydream. "What's going on, Gaara?"

Gaara paused, picking over his words carefully before speaking, "The elders thought—"

Temari sucked her teeth (apparently he hadn't picked them well enough), "Here we go again, what did they want this time? You to sell your soul to the girl? Sign a blood pact?"

Gaara cracked a slight smile, amused. "Not this time." Finally, he picked up the dress and held it up to the light, showing it to Temari. "They wanted me to find a gift."

Temari looked the kimono over, taking in the garment's intricacies, "For Rinmaru?"

Gaara frowned, "For Miharu."

"Oh, well, in that case…" she took the garment and gently placed it back where he pulled it. "Put that away. That dress will be too much for her, the color is too bright and the patterns are way too bold. Miharu would wear something subtler, soft. This one screams 'Look at me!'. That's not Miharu…I don't think anyway."

Gaara eyed the garment like it suddenly became so much more complicated than he had originally thought. "I didn't get any of that. It's just a dress."

Temari shook her head at him, "Gaara, for a woman, nothing is ever just a dress."

"I'm beginning to learn." He replied, still staring at it. He then turned to his sister, "Why did you assume I was shopping for Rinmaru?"

Temari shot him a look which made him think that the answer was so _very_ obvious. He, of course, still hadn't a single inkling. "Because, Gaara, look at it. Can't you see her in this?"

He looked back at the garment and quickly turned away again, marching down the aisle. Therein lied the problem. Once he'd seen it, he couldn't un-see it. "What would you suggest?"

Temari laughed, her hands on her hips as she watched him practically run away from the kimono. "Anything but that."

/

The man in front of me sputtered and coughed as a tiny, sunset orange fish flew out of his mouth and landed on the stone floor next to me. I watched it a second, two, before I started with my hand signs, creating a portal just beneath it to slip away.

He—the man, not the fish—was dripping with water from the shoulders up. His eyes are unfocused, and red, the veins straining in his eyes. He continues to cough up water and spit, hacking up the occasional string of blood. I'm only a couple feet in front of him, my right leg crossed over my left, leaning back in my surprisingly comfortable chair. Some ninja, who's name escapes me, brought it to me with shaking hands, he even blushed when I accepted it. So cute.

A single hair falls between my eyes and a blow it out of my way with a single breath. My bangs almost inch into my right eye, but not quite. I like to keep my vision unobscured.

"He looks like he's on the verge of death," Baki commented, standing on my right, his arms crossed tightly in front of him.

Kankuro swallowed thickly, a single bead of sweat rolling down his cheek. "We should quit for now…I think he's had it."

The man's breathing began to slow, coming close to its normal state. He's clothes are a disarray, dirty and stinking save for his squeaky-clean face.

It had been my aunt's idea to put me in charge of interrogation. It had taken little convincing, on her part, once she handed over my track record (which was flawless).

It was my ability to read people. People like me with narcissistic tendencies were either really good or really bad at torture. I've never met one who was in-between. I was willing to bet that if I had a nobler heart…I would fall into the latter category. I guess we'll never know.

"No," I said, looking over the insurgent impassively, "I think he could last another hour…or twenty minutes tops."

At this the man's head jerked up, his nails digging into the stone, "WAIT—"

I flicked my wrist and a portal covered him from head to shoulders, leaving us only with a view of his neck and body. His lower body began to squirm, to writhe, but there was no point in it. I had him restrained, there was no getting away from it.

I bit my lip to hold in my giggle. Looking from Baki to Kankuro, I could tell…they didn't find it all that funny. And to think, Sand ninja used to ruthless…I blame Gaara.

/

Gaara listened intently as Baki spoke, "Thanks to Lady Rinmaru, we finally have what we need."

At that Gaara's eyes drifted over to me, looking over his clasped hands. "I see. What did you learn?"

Everyone's eyes locked on to me as I sat on the edge of the long table, three seats away from the Kazekage. Everyone else except for Baki sat with grim faces on. It didn't necessarily surprise me that they looked so serious, but…it was a little annoying.

 _Great. Time to be serious._

I straightened up and slid to my feet, looking from face to face. "They call themselves The Divide. They are a group comprised of rouge ninja originally from the Mist as well as lesser known villages throughout the world. From what the insurgent told us, their numbers are meager but they have a variety of means to infiltrate the village."

"Yeah," Kankuro seemed to speak mostly to himself and so I continued. "we know."

"As we speak, they have several spies situated within the village. Only a few of them came out of hiding the night of the festival. They seem to bear no ill will towards the Mist Village; however, they do intend to disrupt the peace _between_ our villages. And their end goal is the destruction of the Sand, which, of course, makes them a danger to the Mist." I took my seat. Mic drop.

After a pause, Gaara addressed me, "Lady Rinmaru, did the insurgent happen to reveal the identities of the others?"

"No." I said, "he wasn't important enough to know. In fact, I suspect even if he did know it wouldn't be very helpful. A transformation jutsu would be sufficient enough to hide them. Even a genin could manage that."

"I figured." Gaara replied in his low monotone, clearly thinking about something. _Then why ask?_ I swear he did it just to piss me off. "Anything else?"

"That's all, Lord Kazekage." I replied, dipping my head respectfully. My manners were impeccable.

He nodded, "Report this information to the Mizukage—" Gaara paused, blinking, "it would be faster if you did it your usual way."

Temari frowned at that, giving me a weird look from Gaara's left.

I smiled, "As you wish. Would my Lord Kazekage be assisting me?"

He smirked, "Unfortunately, I have to something else to prepare. Send my respects."

I nodded in confirmation, smirking back at him. It was funny, this secret between us. "It would be my pleasure."

/

We were dismissed shortly afterwards, Temari signaled for me to wait for her while Gaara gave her final instructions. I waited outside the door as they spoke in hushed tones.

"…meeting with her tonight." Gaara said. "Could you bring the gift to me?"

"Of course. Are you changing?" Temari asked now talking in her big sister tone she often took when she was delivering very obvious information to her brothers.

A pause from Gaara, "No. My clothes aren't dirty."

"For goodness sakes, Gaara, you're going on a date not discussing war tactics." Temari huffed with a laugh, "I'll bring you by a change of clothes…and a mirror too. Maybe if you saw the difference I wouldn't have to remind you every second to make more of an effort. Boys."

I had to hold in my laugh, rolling my eyes with a smile. Gaara was so…

I pursed my lips, Ichigo popping into my head suddenly. I needed a drink.

Not a moment too soon (right before I'd forgotten who I was waiting for) Temari exited into the hallway and began to walk with me.

"So," I began, "What was all that?"

She rolled her eyes, "My brother being a boy. You know I really thought he'd be a little better at this than Kankuro with him being a genius and all."

"Ah, there's the beauty of it. You assume that because he's a genius in one category that he's a genius in the others, but that's usually never true. For someone to be so blessed, he'd hardly even be considered human anymore, don't you agree?"

Temari glanced over at me, "That seems a little extreme."

I waved her off, with a grin, "Trust me, sweet Temari, I know exactly what I'm talking about."

"I bet you do," She laughed, "Whatever happened to those men who were in love with you?"

"Men? What men?"

Temari just looked at me.

I gasped, clasping my hands together, "Right! My targets…I have no idea. I'm fairly certain Asa scared them away, but I can't be sure."

"Forgotten already, huh? It's almost sad."

I shrugged, "They weren't that interesting. I find that most men, once you've figured them out, usually aren't." I sighed, "But what else are we going to look at?"

Another laugh from Temari, "I suppose that's true but you're telling me there hasn't been one single guy to catch your eye? Not one?"

I thought for a moment as we made it outside, the warm sun making me blink before my eyes adjusted. "Well…there was this nobleman."

"A nobleman?" Temari snorted, "I forgot you liked your men to be beautiful above all else."

I hooked my right arm into her left, "Oh yes, and he was beautiful…deliciously so…"

"Go on." Temari elbowed me as I paused for dramatics.

"He was tall, dark of hair with dark, dark eyes. His hair was collar length, and it felt like silk running through my fingers—a lot like my own gorgeous locks—"

"Rinmaru."

"Anyway," I continued with a laugh, "I thought we were the same and we were…until he cracked just like an egg." I licked my lips, remembering the taste of his, "It was sad really."

"What do you mean?"

"He was of the same mind as me, save for the amazing ninjutsu. We were twins, played the same games, broke similar hearts. A match pair. Exact. Except, one day he just started to be weird. He started becoming clingy…and jealous." I laughed, shaking my head.

"And you've never been jealous before?"

I looked at her like she'd forgotten who she was speaking to, maybe she had, Temari had been working awfully hard lately, "Why would I be? Have you?"

Temari just blinked, "Fair point."

"Long story short, I broke things off. He threw a tantrum. I avoided a crazy." I clapped my hands together. "Rinmaru lives to fight again."

"And he's 'a crazy' for what, exactly? Falling in love with you?"

"Of course not, Temari. Have you not been listening?" I rolled my eyes, only half meaning it, "He's 'a crazy' for breaking one hard and fast rule."

"Which is?"

"He forgot who he was and most importantly…he forgot who _I_ was."

"A fatal mistake."

I swear Temari was the only upside to this godforsaken hellhole.

Finally, I released a sigh of relief, "Now you're getting it."

I stopped suddenly, as I realized something. Temari stopped too, looking back at me with concern written all over her face, "Rinmaru, are you alright?"

I looked at her, and then looked back behind us at Gaara's office, towering above the other buildings. I ground my teeth together, frowning.

"It's nothing," I said. I was spending too much time here, talking way too much.

/

"What was all that between you and Rinmaru?" Temari asked leaning into the door of his office. "Is there something you're not telling me, Gaara?"

Gaara had accepted the clothes his sister had given him, a three piece suit. The only thing he had left now was the tie. A useless accessory. "What brought this on?"

"Your weird exchange at the meeting today."

Gaara knew that Rinmaru liked Temari very much, so much so, that whenever she was stuck with either him or Kankuro, she complained about their sister's absence. Still, he didn't know if he should speak on it. He felt a weird pressure suddenly, one he needed to alleviate. "Did you ask Rinmaru?"

"That was the plan…until she sidetracked me."

"She's good at that," Gaara remarked with a chuckle, "What did she say?"

Gaara was also pretty good at avoiding topics.

"Well, she told me about this nobleman who—" Temari stopped, and looked away a little guiltily. "Sorry, Gaara. Girl talk."

Well, that ended better than he expected. He didn't have to give up anything. "Temari," he began, looking quizzically down at his tie, "Can you…?

She laughed, "Of course, Gaara." She immediately began to fix it, adjusting it as needed, "Are you nervous?"

"I don't think so." He responded staring down at her hands, "I haven't thought about it. It's not like we've never spoken before." Except this time, they'd be alone, no Temari and no Kankuro to run interference. Still…

"Good. There's nothing to be nervous about. Just talk to her like you'd talk to me and you'll be just fine."

/

"Lady Miharu." Gaara dipped his head and she bowed low in response.

"Lord Gaara," Miharu replied covering her face slightly with a fan. "You look handsome tonight, that grey brings out your eyes."

He wasn't sure what she meant by that, seeing his eyes weren't exactly grey but…

"Thank you, M'lady." Gaara quickly looked her over, her clothes were immaculate but modest. She wore a purplish color with layers of different fabric over a single color. He had no idea what to call it. "Your dress compliments you as well."

She nodded her thanks, walking closer toward him with a gentle smile, "So, where are we going? Your brother, Kankuro, didn't tell me anything as he escorted me downstairs." She paused and then gave him a slightly excited look, her eyes widening innocently. "Is it a secret?"

Gaara couldn't think of a single reason it would be. "No. We're going to this restaurant near here. It's a short walk—"

The excitement flickered for a moment as she looked down at her feet, "I'm afraid I didn't wear the right shoes for walking."

He looked down at her shoes. They weren't that high. He'd seen the fifth Hokage fight in higher shoes. He looked back up at her, "It's a short walk."

"Still…" she began, "I'd rather not, if you don't mind. We can take my carriage."

That solved that problem. "Sure."

/

"You're very stoic, Lord Gaara." Miharu commented as she slowly ate her food. Gaara had finished his quickly, for whatever reason it gave him something to do. He wasn't even that hungry. He should've ordered seconds.

"Lord Gaara?"

"I've been told." He replied honestly. In fact, someone had commented on his silence before, although, not so kindly. He allowed himself a smile.

Miharu giggled, her tone warm. "You have a sweet smile, Lord Gaara."

He looked up at her at that, slightly startled. He didn't respond, he wasn't really sure how.

"Tell me," she leaned forward slightly, smiling too, "What's so funny?"

That he could deal with, "What you said before…Rinmaru had said the same thing to me…only she wasn't so polite."

A line appeared between her eyebrows, "The Lady Rinmaru?"

"Yes. Lady Rinmaru is very straightforward, a lot like Temari."

"Oh," Miharu replied, "Lady Rinmaru seems like she can be a little too much at times, like she loves attention."

Gaara smirked to himself, "She can be. And she does, she lives for it. And for making me uncomfortable."

Miharu's voice filled with soft concern. "She sounds awful."

"She isn't." Gaara said immediately, definitively. "I'm just not doing her justice. If you spent time with her, you'd see what I mean."

"I see." Miharu replied.

"She forces you to like her," he explained, frowning down at his empty plate, "it's like you don't have a choice even if she's practically handing you reasons to dislike her. She buries her kindness within insult and hands it to you reluctantly…like you asked for it. She's…" he searched for more words, finding none, only phrases. None of them quite capturing what he meant. "She's a puzzle."

Gaara stopped talking as a pregnant silence filled the space between them. He looked away from his plate and up at Miharu who wore a weird expression on her face, her lips pressed into a thin line. "Is something wrong?"

Her response was dry, "No. I'm just feeling a little tired. We should go back, I think."

Gaara stood to his feet having the distinct feeling that he'd done something wrong, "Of course."

/

He'd barely been with Miharu an entire hour, and already he was back at home. After Miharu left to her room, Temari and Kankuro immediately pounced on him.

"So?" Kankuro asked with a crooked smile. "When's the wedding?"

Gaara only shrugged.

"Gaara." Temari had said, sternly, "What happened?"

He looked from Temari to Kankuro, finding sympathy in both of their faces, "I have no idea."

Temari immediately crossed her arms, "What a little troll," she said, "I knew this was going to happen! I don't know who she thinks she is but—"

"Temari, she wasn't rude to me. It was quite the opposite actually." Gaara explained with a frown, trying to wrap his head around it himself. "I thought it was fine…she was excited…"

"That's good." Kankuro nodded, "That's a good sign."

"Then she almost looked angry, but I didn't do anything."

"Oh." Temari's hands dropped from her hips, and her irked expression eased away. "Then what happened?"

"Your guess is as good as mine." He replied turning away from them, "I think I'll go get some work done."

"Okay." Temari said softly, as he walked down the hall towards his home office.

Gaara sat with his fingers steepled against his desk. The moon was throwing light against his desk and into the room, displaying his shadow stretching in front of him. He'd probably go all of his life without understanding the intricacies of a woman's mind—the do's and don't's. Maybe he just needed time, or maybe it was hopeless.

He glanced around the room, his eyes falling on the clock that read two minutes to two. He'd been sitting for hours now. Almost immediately, a smile crept unto his lips as a memory began to surface reminding him that somethings did need a little time….

()()()

" _I doubt I need to answer that." He'd said, careful to avoid looking directly in her eyes. Everything she said to him now sounded like a trap—a challenge—a game. And Gaara, being who he was, was much too inexperienced to get involved in either. That didn't seem to stop the Mist kunoichi in the slightest, no matter how many times he fumbled or stuttered._

 _She just smiled, and waved her hand, dismissing the subject—saving him from herself. He'd give her a little credit however, she did seem to realize his limit even when he didn't have the energy to voice it._

" _My Mizukage wishes to speak to you." She said finally after a moment or two of pause, some of that decorum from before returning suddenly._

" _I sent her a detailed report about what happened. I doubt she'll get it until much later." Gaara eyed her carefully, she still hadn't moved from beside him._

 _Rinmaru scoffed, falling back onto the desk, her elbows holding her up. "Yeah, well, she's in a bit of a hurry."_

" _Are you proposing a faster means of communication?"_

" _It's two minutes to two." Rinmaru glanced at the grandfather clock to the left of his desk. "We should begin soon."_

 _Gaara narrowed his eyes at her, imploring her to explain further._

" _I locked the door when we came in," she said, gesturing for him to take a seat at his desk while she drew the blinds. He hesitated only briefly before following her commands. She noticed—her lips curling into a smile briefly before straightening out again. "We shouldn't be disturbed."_

 _Rinmaru took one last look at the clock before beginning to slowly and meticulously draw hand signs. Water began to pull from the air around her, as well as from the pouch Rinmaru kept around her waist. The changes were slow but perfect. There were twenty signs in all, each utilized at least twice in various patterns. Gaara narrowed his gaze, leaning forward slightly as she worked. He knew, obviously, what she was doing—he'd seen it—but…never quite like this. The process never seemed to take so much time._

 _Finally, Rinmaru reached out into the air, her arm ramrod straight and said, "Open."_

 _One of her portals formed in front of her, long and oval in shape, glowing like a river reflecting the moon's razes. She turned her head and grinned back at Gaara. Through the portal he could just make out an office and a woman with long rust colored hair waiting patiently against her desk. The scene appeared to have fractured glass in front of it._

" _So," Rinmaru began, "Do you want to meet here…or over there?"_

 _Gaara frowned but did not fail to respond. Her power was…when you considered her character…deeply unsettling, but…he supposed the same could be said for most shinobi. The same could definitely be said for both Naruto and Sasuke but now he trusted them. Despite all, he trusted them, so when the Mizukage stepped forward through the portal and Rinmaru flashed him that devilish grin he replied simply, "I had no idea your jutsu was so strong."_

 _Rinmaru blinked rapidly, seemingly disappointed with his reaction, "My aunt's powers are far more impressive I think. Right, My lady?"_

 _Rinmaru held out a hand and helped the Mizukage through the portal and into his office. She turned to him with a warm smile, "Hello, Kazekage."_

 _Surprise registered only briefly on his face before it was replaced with his usual expression of mild indifference mixed with a touch of interest, "Mizukage."_

 _Rinmaru guided her superior into a seat in front of Gaara's desk and stood just behind the woman._

 _The Mizukage looked over her shoulder at her subordinate with a slight frown, "Rinmaru, dear, you shouldn't be so formal." She then directed Rinmaru to take the seat beside her._

 _Rinmaru, with an irked expression responded with a deceptively sweet voice, "You could do with a bit of formality every once in a while, My Lady."_

 _Gaara almost chuckled. She was one to talk_

 _The Mizukage just waved her off with a slight smile. "You're much too serious."_

 _Gaara was absolutely shocked._

 _Rinmaru only shrugged, "I am my mother's daughter. She's had people killed for less."_

 _After a pause, the Mizukage returned her attention to Gaara as if their conversation hadn't happened. "Now, what is this about?"_

 _Gaara quickly explained the situation, including the part where the insurgent spouted his apparent loyalties to the Mist._

" _Hmm. We still have several missing-nin at large. I can provide you with their names and faces but something tells me it will be more difficult than that." The Mizukage said, "Rinmaru, if you'll have her, will stay here for as long as this threat exists. Please contact me if you need Mist shinobi for any reason."_

" _Understood, thank you. Lady Rinmaru has already proved herself to be very helpful."_

" _I'm glad. And the intruder?"_

" _We haven't interrogated him yet."_

" _when you do, I suggest that you utilize Rinmaru. Out of all my interrogators…she's been known to get the best results."_

 _Gaara glanced over to the Mist Kunoichi in question, she raised an eye brow at him playfully. He believed it._

" _Good," the Mizukage glanced over to Rinmaru and back to Gaara, "If you need me at a moment's notice please contact me through Rinmaru, this is our safest means of communication."_

" _I agree. If you're able, try to find out more about this group. Someone knows something…even if they think they don't…an innocent bystander perhaps. I'd like to avoid casualties."_

" _I'll do my best. I'll have my most trusted shinobi working on that as soon as we're done here. We're allies, Kazekage, I want to avoid spilling blood as much as you do." With that, she stood to her feet and an extended her hand to him, "Until then."_

 _Gaara returned the gesture also rising to his feet. Rinmaru was slower to rise, surprisingly silent throughout their entire exchange. The Mizukage noticed this too because after she dropped Gaara's hand she winked at him and tilted her head in her niece's direction. Rinmaru's expression was impassive, but obviously very aware of the two of them. Her arms were hidden behind her back._

" _Look at her," the Mizukage giggled, curling her finger beneath Rinmaru's chin, making the girl roll her eyes, "She's so formal."_

 _Rinmaru's smile appeared slowly and she chuckled, "And you wonder why my mother never liked you."_

" _Ha! She likes me. She just hates to admit it." The Mizukage threw her hair over her shoulder. "She married my brother didn't she? We're practically twins."_

 _Rinmaru scoffed, but her tone was gentle, "Yes, my Lady, you're as similar as a lion and a lamb."_

 _The Mizukage laughed, her eyes shiny. "You're so mean, Rinmaru."_

 _Gaara didn't interrupt them as they went on, he figured this was how they said their goodbyes._

" _I'll send you my report soon," Rinmaru told the Mizukage, a look passing between them. "Don't miss me too much until then."_

 _And suddenly, the Mizukage rushed forward and pulled her into an embrace. Rinmaru didn't look shocked at all but was clearly not completely prepared for the onslaught of affection. Gaara missed what happened next because he returned to his desk and began to busy himself with its tidiness, even if he did keep everything spotless._

 _After a while he looked up, after hearing a snap, and the Mizukage was gone._

 _Rinmaru stood there still though, gazing after it as if willing it to return. She clutched a piece of royal blue paper in her hands held together by a red seal. After a short pause, she turned to him, animated again._

" _Did you enjoy the show?" she asked, bouncing to sit on his desk. He leaned back in his chair, careful to keep his eyes just above hers. She moved her head, so she could catch his gaze fully. "I usually charge admission, but for you I made an exception…do you know why?"_

 _She waited, one eyebrow raised as he searched for his response. He looked down at his hands and then up, his cheeks burning only slightly, "Because we're friends?"_

" _Yes." She rolled her eyes before leaning towards him and flicking his ear so it turned red as his hair, "But also because I trust you."_

 _Gaara didn't speak, only watched as she turned away from him._

 _Rinmaru slipped off his desk and waltzed toward the door, "Don't fuck it up."_

Yes. He decided. He just needed time…and a little help.

/

Gaara was not too easy to read, but, sometimes, I felt like I was the Kazekage whisperer. Not world class—mind you—but I'd have to do.

Gaara tried to punch me, but I dodged it easily. And when he kicked at me, I jumped and landed on top of his leg. It came down like a rock thrown into a lake, but then I round house kicked him and sent him to the cold floor. I landed lightly on my feet before walking over to him.

He attempted to stand but I plopped down next to him. "Okay, Panda, what's your problem?"

"Was I so obvious?"

"You're distracted. Your taijutsu, since we've been working together, has vastly improved. That fight lasted all of a minute."

"I've been thinking," He began with the obvious. I rolled my eyes, but I crossed my legs and straigtened up to give him my full attention. You had to be careful with the hopeless, they were fragile beings in need of extra care. " I—"

"Let me cut you off right there." I said, "There are two types of badasses in this world…"

Gaara narrowed his gaze at me, but didn't protest like he used to do. He figured I was going somewhere, I guess.

"There are your kind and my kind. My kind of badass has no problem with either sex…we're practically gods."

Gaara looked blankly at me, disapprovingly. See? And these people didn't think I knew them.

"Your kind of badass, while cool, have it bad because they have immense trouble with the opposite sex. And the sad part is that they don't know that they'll have trouble until they get older and are forced into situations with their opposites. Then they are left sad, alone and very confused. And this, of course, affects their mental stability and awareness." I gestured toward his erect person, "Exhibit A."

His expression didn't change. "How astute."

"Don't be mean, Gaara. I haven't yet finished." I slid to my knees and caught his eye. "You're having troubles with Miharu because you don't understand women. A blind animal can see that. You understand your sister, which isn't the same…and thinking otherwise will only hurt you."

I seemed to have struck a cord because his shoulders immediately relaxed and he waited for me to continue. "I told you that Ichigo would help you with this, but seeing as she isn't here—"

"And that didn't actually happen." Gaara supplied dryly, making me giggle.

I stood to my feet and offered him my hand, "I'll be giving you lessons."

He glanced at it, hesitating, only briefly before accepting it. "You are confident."

"I'm Rinmaru." I flung my hair over my shoulder, "I am nothing if not confident."

/

Asa held her father's hand as they walked through the village. The sun was setting, but it was still quite bright out. They were having dinner at her favorite restaurant. She didn't want to let it show, but she'd been looking forward to this outing all week.

"How was your lesson today?" His father asked, with an amused smile on his face. He had kind eyes her father, sweet and teasing. And his laugh, his laugh was like music. Her mother didn't think so. "Are you the most dangerous lady in the Sand Village yet?"

Asa held her head up higher, "Not yet." She said, "I'd have to surpass my Big Sister first."

"The Lady Rinmaru, right?" he asked, his voice taking on this curious tone. "I'm afraid I haven't met her yet."

"I thought you saw her the night of the festival—"Asa stopped and whirled around. She…she thought she saw a shadow.

"I did but…she was so busy." He shrugged, a little embarrassed, "I guess I didn't have the courage to speak. She's very stunning…your Big Sister."

Asa glanced over to their left and right. The building next to them buzzed with people, in fact all the buildings on this side were alive. She heard the ding of doors and waves goodbye. There was constant motion, but still…

"Honey?" came her father's concerned tone.

"I just saw something. A flash. A shadow or…something." Asa responded, not moving from her spot.

Her father looked around, seeing nothing, "It's probably the anbu. The Kazekage has them looking after us."

"Right." She paused, spared another glance to the building on her right and kept walking. "Of course."

/

"Do it already."

"I don't know about this."

"Oh, come on. It'll help me prove my point."

"Just tell me your point." Gaara responded tiredly. They stood on top of a building at the edge of the main part of the village. The building faced a bar, alight with small lamps outside, brightening the red faces of the drunk and tipsy alike. A couple, or at least, what Gaara assumed to be a couple, stumbled from the entrance, holding onto each other with large smiles. Others who weren't drunk were dressed well, wearing what they thought were there best. Rinmaru assured him that those people were there for the same reason they were.

"Which is?" he asked stiffly, his arms crossed firmly beneath his chest.

"Gaara," she began, taking that tone she usually took when she was trying to convince him to do something he normally wouldn't, "I'm your teacher, am I not? Your sensei of love?"

Gaara groaned, this was starting to feel embarrassing.

She grinned then cracking up, "Don't you trust me?"

That had done it. He looked at her, weaved his hand signs and completed the transformation jutsu. "Why can you look like yourself?"

Having won, she skipped off the edge of the building her vibrant hair swinging behind her, as she smiled, "Because _I_ am not the fucking Kazekage."

"Fair." He allowed himself a smile before catching up quickly as she entered the bar. She had a certain way she said things, mostly his name, his title, that made him feel bigger, stand taller, grander. It was as if she was transplanting her own confidence onto the words she spoke. They never sounded so impressive to him, not until she said them.

Rinmaru had maneuvered them to a table that faced much of the others. She'd gotten them sake, poured two glasses put only held hers in her hands. She brought the porcelain to her lips but she never drank. Her eyes flickered up to meet his, "Have a drink, Gaara."

"As soon as you tell me what we're doing." He replied, Rinmaru was getting a lot of stares, he'd probably be getting some too if he looked like himself. However, he had taken on a less conspicuous appearance. Earrings, hair pulled into a ponytail at the back of his head and a slightly bored expression. Everyone seemed to look through him. It was nice.

"We," she swung the contents of her cup around in a circle, "Are having our first lesson. Once you understand this concept…all the other things I show you will make more sense."

"I see." He nodded, but he still couldn't shake the feeling that he should be doing something else—work or anything.

"Not now, Gaara." She replied as if she'd read his mind, "don't make that face. We'll handle everything in due time."

He chuckled, trying to focus now on their "lesson."

"Go on."

Rinmaru sat for a moment, still as still, her eyes floating around the room. She'd brush his shoulder with her hand as she looked, all part of her show he assumed. And finally, her eyes settled, and she was all in place.

Gaara let the seconds fly by, he didn't keep his eyes glued to her. He allowed his eyes to wander too, to see what she was seeing. Suddenly, she turned her body slightly toward him. She was on his left, so close to him he could practically feel her against his skin without her even touching him.

Rinmaru whispered to him, her voice running over his ears barely above a whisper, "See that boy?" she inclined her head to a dark-haired man sitting with his friends, finding any excuse he can to dart his eyes from their faces over to Rinmaru. His eyes would go down to his cup, to his friends and back to her—always to her. "He knows I'm watching."

The man, Gaara would put him at twenty-four at the oldest and nineteen at the youngest. Gaara could see the man sit up straight, a hand went to his hair which he then ran beneath his chin, looking over to her slowly. Rinmaru's lips parted, her smile spread slow, gradually. The man's did too. He laughed a little too loudly, having more fun than he had ever seemed to be having. Gaara noticed them when he first came in, they looked like the most miserable people in the building. "He likes the way I stare."

It was automatic, Gaara could see, these changes in him. Gaara wondered if he noticed? Did anyone really notice? The man seemed alive, bursting with confidence that seemed dim a moment ago. He even seemed to be attracting the attention of other women now, all of them drawn to this person—this living being.

Gaara opened his mouth, felt it fall open as he turned to Rinmaru. This phenomenon…"But why? Why does this happen?"

Rinmaru dropped her gaze, returning it to him. Her eyes were soft emerald in this light, sober, calm as the eye of a storm. "Why?" she asked, a strand of her strawberry hair falling into her eyes, "It's just human nature."

* * *

Author's Note: So, so many pages! Hello, friends! I am back. Excuse the typos, I'll fix that up just before the last chapter.


	8. Chapter 8

**How I Met Your Father**

Chapter Eight: Something There

* * *

 _There's something sweet, and almost kind_

* * *

"They look so happy."

"They are happy." I replied gazing over the edge.

Asa settled down beside me on the roof. The other kids ran and played on the ground down below us. Genkai kept her little hands clasped to Gaara's clothes as he watched over them. Kota, Ichiro and the newest addition, Watabi, played ninja, throwing paper stars at one another. Sosuke and Ran were huddled close together over a collection of marbles. Jin, Daichi and Karin spun around like tops in the sand. The rest giggled and laughed, running around their Kazekage with their hands clasped. Every now and then, Gaara would look up in our direction, the corner of his lips lifting up in a smile.

I smirked back at him.

 _What a dork._

I leaned back and folded my arms beneath my head. The sky was still blue, the sun still bright, but it was starting to sink, painting the cotton-candy sky with stripes of gold. It was rather…peaceful.

Asa drew her legs up to her chest and leaned back on her hands. Asa was becoming a little mini-me. She wore royal blue with a gold sash around her waist and black leggings. It was one of the many things her father bought her to wear when we trained together; however, it was one of the few colors she _actually_ wore. I shouldn't have to say why.

"You know," I began, closing my eyes, "Holding back what you feel isn't a strength. I've seen people do it time and time again….it never works in their favor."

She said nothing, but I could hear her shift closer. She was listening.

"Living isn't adjusting or assimilating. It's breathing fire, walking through walls and jumping when someone dares you not to. Nobles complain that they have the most restrictions but really we have the most room, the most means to do _exactly_ as we please. When you have the means, the money, the power, you move and the ocean will part itself." I glanced over to her with a smirk, "That's why _I_ never learned how to swim."

Asa giggled, turning to face me. "I bet you can swim."

"I mean, I _can_ …but I don't have to."

Another giggle, one that made her cheeks turn pink and her eyes water. The laugh passed and she was quiet again, looking down at her sandals. "Big sister?"

"Little one?"

"Did you ever…hate your mother?"

"No." I said, "But everyone's mother is different."

"Have you ever wanted to hate her?"

"No." I watched as water ran into the corners of her eyes. "But…how you feel about your mother is up to you. You're Asa, you should feel what you want to. Forsake the consequences."

"That…that seems irresponsible."

I shrugged, "It might be."

"But you wouldn't care." That wasn't a question, but I answered anyway.

"Not even a little bit."

She giggled again, "You're too much."

"You don't believe that."

She was quiet again, but I just watched her. I watched as her brow trembled, wrestling over what to ask next. Finally, she cleared her throat and spoke, "…when are you leaving?"

Her voice was low, tentative and afraid.

I could lie, or I could tell the truth. I didn't know which would be easier. "I'm not sure."

"Do…you want to leave?"

A trick question! These are best dealt with no real answer.

I rolled on my side and she turned to copy me, her little eyes fighting to hold in water. "I wouldn't want to leave you."

The tears finally broke and they ran down her face like little streams, making her eyes shine. I wrapped an arm around her and pulled her close to me, her head now resting on my chest.

It dawned on me finally that I wasn't doing these children any favors. I claimed to be building them up, but that wasn't the case. I was crippling them, setting them up for greatness before I inevitably changed the rules and left them behind. Left them broken.

I should stop now, ween them off of me.

I pull my hand through Asa rust colored hair. Her smelled like lavender, my favorite.

I should stop, but…as I said, I _can_ swim, I just choose not to.

/

"Well," Temari sat next to me, "Someone looks a little out of it."

"That's because I haven't heard your voice all day," I said with a smirk, "What else am I going to use as an anchor to this world?"

Kankuro sat across from Temari, "Is that what you tell your boy toys?"

I winked at him, "You know it."

Temari laughed, but still side eyed me. There was treacherous concern there, hiding behind her teal eyes. She didn't mention it again though, and I was grateful. Still, I'll have to avoid those eyes from now on.

"So!" I clasped my hands together, "What did our lovely chef prepare for us today?"

"Exactly what you asked him to prepare." Temari rolled her eyes.

"I didn't ask," I amended, "He offered…I just accepted. What's the harm in that?"

Kankuro huffed and leaned back in his chair at the dining table. "The _harm_ is that we've been having seafood for the past two days. It's not cheap."

Contrary to popular belief, Kankuro is a miserly old man.

Gaara walked into the room and took the seat at the head of the table, next to me. "Rinmaru has been paying for it herself. I don't see the harm in it."

Contrary to popular believe, Gaara isn't nearly as stingy as he looks.

Kankuro eyed us suspiciously, "But how are we getting it so fast?"

"The trade agreement?" I said, waving him off, " _Really_ , Kankuro, I thought you were paying attention."

"But I—"

"Drop it, Kankuro. The food's free. Let it go." Temari said, leaning against me, "Besides, we all know Rinmaru has everyone in the village wrapped around her little fingers. Last week, she had all of our food catered…for free."

"Oh, yeah," Kankuro released a sigh of contentment, slapping his stomach, "That was one delicious week."

"It was nothing. That was from Sosuke's father. It was my payment for training his son," I shrugged, "It was hardly free."

"What about the fireworks?" Temari asked, now switching sides.

"I gave Utau a compliment."

Kankuro shook his head in disbelief. "It spelt your name."

"We had tea together. Really, you all are making a big deal out of nothing. I'm sure you'd get the same treatment."

"But we're from here," Temari said, "You're an outsider being treated like you were the Feudal Lord's granddaughter."

"I am the feudal Lord's granddaughter." I knew what they said was true, but sometimes I like to pretend I didn't. You know, just because.

"Our feudal lord."

Nonchalantly, I shrugged, "Unimportant. Anyway, where is your princess, Gaara? I feel like I haven't seen her since…well yesterday."

Gaara folded his hands together, "She's decided to take dinner in her room. She's not feeling her best."

"Uh-huh."

I wasn't born yesterday, she hadn't been feeling well since they got back from their 'date'. Gaara was still in the dark about why it ended so early, I was not. What he did was simple, he mentioned another woman in her presence. Is her behavior petty and childish? Yes. Does it ultimately matter? Not even a little bit. He's bound by duty to marry the girl, and I will help him do it. It wouldn't be easy, but it would get done. "So…do you guys want to hear an embarrassing story about Gaara?"

"Yes, please." Temari said excitedly.

"This is gonna be good." Kankuro shot Gaara a smirk. "At least I won't be the only one anymore."

Gaara sighed dramatically but didn't look away as I began. In fact, he turned in his chair to give me his full attention. His chin propped up against his knuckles. He was such a dork.

I cleared my throat, "Ahem. Okay, I took our _dear_ Kazekage to a bar, right? This was two days ago—don't make that face Gaara, I didn't put a kunai to your neck—anyway so this guy walks up to us and you know me—"

"You love a good flirt." Temari cut in.

I tapped her nose with my pointer finger, "That's right! Look at you….knowing things."

She wrinkled her nose at me, but I kept going. "Now, shh, or you'll miss the best part, Dearest."

/

Miharu Abarai was a beautiful girl. She knew this because it was what she had been told since the day she was born, and it was no mistake. She was born to be beautiful, marry the powerful, and bring both honor and power to her family name. That was her mission. It was every bit as important as retrieving a lost scroll or keeping clan secrets. Her duty was the very pinnacle on which noblemen stood. It was what divided the important from the commoners. Her mission had been simple. Be charming, be beautiful, and be whatever she needed to be to make the Kazekage love her.

Pitifully simple.

As she sat in her room, alone and bored, she reflected on what had transpired between them, what had forced her here.

Jealousy.

It was a foreign feeling, and it burrowed deep. It was ugly, made its inhabitants ugly, and she wanted no part of it. Still, as Gaara talked on and on about that Mist noblewoman it had made her blood boil. The girl was beautiful, achingly so. And she knew it too, she was never too subtle. Miharu supposed that was part of her charm, she didn't pretend at humility like much of the noble born. Miharu could see herself being the girl's friend if and only if—

She banished that thought, looking at herself in the mirror. Miharu decided to get dressed and join them all for dinner. She was irritated but she was a lady, she wouldn't let it bother her. Just as she was entering the dining room, she was stopped by the sound of uproarious laughter.

It was the four of them, huddle together like a little family. They leaned in to each other, swapping jokes, trading jabs.

Rinmaru was at the center, telling some ridiculous story. They all joined in, interrupted parts, but she'd simply make some 'clever' remark and keep going as if it added to the story. Temari and Kankuro's attentions were grabbed. Miharu expected as much. What she didn't expect, despite knowing all that she did, she didn't expect _that_ look on Gaara's face.

Did he even notice? Did she? Or did he wear the look so often it hardly registered anymore? Either way, he didn't seem to notice Miharu's absence at all. The world could have ended and he'd still look like _that._

Miharu folded her arms, spun and stormed from the room, breathing fire. She wouldn't accept it, if it was the last thing she did.

/

I'd given myself an hour to unwind before I began my lesson with Gaara. That morning I'd spent it with the kids and then in secret meetings, planning for The Divide. I was already sick of them—The Divide, not the kids.

I wish there was a button I could press to snuff them out and eliminate them all in one go.

No trial.

I wasn't that big on trials anyway. What followed crimes? Only punishment, not a meeting _about_ the punishment. We needed the actual punishment straightaway. But…the world was becoming more civilized, not many people still agreed with me. Anywho, we were closing in on them, whether they knew it or not. We would get them soon. I could practically taste it. Home? Well, home was right around the corner. I was excited to leave this place—that's funny.

I laughed, opening my eyes to stare at the ceiling.

When did I start calling it a place instead of a hellhole?

I sat up, and pulled a piece of paper close to me. I needed to leave and because I couldn't actually do that, I needed something to make me feel like I was moving.

I unfolded Ichigo's letter, and began reading:

 _Rinmaru,_

 _It has been a long time, hasn't it? I know what you're thinking, I'm not talking about since we last corresponded—so erase that remark right this minute. I meant since we've seen each other. We've never gone this long without one another. It's strange. I miss your face and your strange antics. I know you miss mine too, even if you tell yourself you don't. You know you love me._

 _But, I won't get too sentimental, I know it makes you squirm😊. Anyway, I have some news._

 _I may be staying in the Hidden Stone village longer than anticipated. I made quite a few friends here, some of them we met during the war (they remember you by the way), and they've invited me to join them for this annual festival of theirs. I've already told the Mizukage, she knows. I do feel bad for Chojuro. What will he do for so long without us? Probably live happily for a few more days._

 _Also…I think I met someone. I won't write it down here (I don't want to jinx it). But, anyway, I won't write you a novel this time. You'll have to make do with these few lines here…until I see you again._

 _Missing you to the moon and back,_

 _Ichigo "Ichimaru" Fujime_

For once, I was at a loss. I knew what this letter meant. She was getting pulled in, wrapped up with foreign ninja. She was becoming part of them. And she was doing it… _separate_ from me. It felt good but it also felt strange. I was happy, but also empty. Would she be there when I finally came home? Would she ever come home?

I laughed. There was relief in that laugh. I wouldn't think it, I wouldn't put it to words but…it was nice knowing that I'd never set _her_ up for failure. It was nice knowing that she could survive without me. Her wings were strong enough for her to fly.

/

"So, first things first, pretend I'm Miharu." Rinmaru settled down on the building's ledge. She'd insisted that they go somewhere no one could hear them, but she'd refused to stay indoors. He didn't put up much of a protest, he was happy for the change in space too. It was better than being trapped in his office. "Talk."

Gaara blinked, "About what?"

Rinmaru smirked, "Anything."

"You don't mean that."

"Yes, I really do." She gestured with her hand, "Go on. Talk."

Gaara opened his mouth to speak and then closed it, there was a trick here somewhere. He knew it.

With a roll of her eyes, she began, "Fine. I'll start. Hello, Lord Gaara."

He narrowed his eyes at her, sensing a trap, knowing he'd spring it eventually, "Hello, Lady Miharu."

"It's nice weather isn't it?" she'd made her voice all high and sweet like Miharu's. He was tempted to laugh.

"I…yes. It is."

"Do you prefer it this way? Windy?"

"It's fine. I don't really have a preference—"

"WRONG!" Rinmaru reached out and slapped his hand with a thin switch.

Gaara yanked his hand back, "What the hell was that?"

"Your punishment." She hoisted it in the air like it was made of gold, "for everything you do wrong…you get the stick. For everything you do right," Rinmaru reached around and pulled out a bowl of fruit. "you get this…clear?"

Gaara frowned but didn't object, he didn't know what he expected from her. But, this did fit within the parameters of her character. "Fine," he bit off, watching that switch of hers, she'd lose it the next time she tried it on him, "but tell me what I did wrong."

Rinmaru wagged her eyebrows at him, he had a feeling she knew what he was thinking.

"First, you missed the chance to turn the conversation into one about me. You should have asked me how I was when you greeted me, or _you_ should have asked which weather I preferred. Either way, the conversation will focus on me." Rinmaru said, "Remember, the key is _me_."

Gaara nodded slowly, propping his chin against his knuckles in thought. "I see."

"Secondly, don't be boring. Mysterious is good, but you have to give a bit more. You're making yourself out to be the least interesting person on the planet. Which, of course, we both know is untrue. You're the goddamn Kazekage. You are, quite literally, the boss."

His lips twitched as he tried to hold back a laugh.

"Women love to talk about themselves, well women like Miharu love when people ask about them, they thrive on it. As far as she's concerned, she shouldn't have to really start the conversation. You should be doing that, but…not too much. We don't want to come on too strong."

Gaara was following easily enough but understanding and doing are two different things.

"Now, when you answer a question it should leave her curious. She should want to ask a follow up. But we're getting a little ahead of ourselves here—

"Rinmaru." Gaara's eyes focused completely on hers. She had really long, unusually dark eyelashes, it looked like they were reaching out to him. "I think I'd understand this more if you were to demonstrate."

She pursed her lips, drawing one eyebrow up to look him over. Then a smile appeared on her face, he knew that smile. "Okay…how would you like me to do that?"

"Let me know you," he said, "the way you'd have me get to know Miharu."

The smug smile on her lips faltered for a second, and her eyes ducked down to her hands before returning to him with their bright, earth shattering power. "Do you remember what I told you all those weeks ago? When we were in the meeting room?"

Yes. And no. He remembered her actions, but his brain was a little too disoriented to remember her words. His cheeks burned when he remembered their proximity, and her long leg bumping into him.

She stood to her feet and stepped onto the ledge, leaving her hands outstretched. "Keep that advice in mind."

/

It was first thing in the morning. No. It kinda wasn't. It was before the sun had come up and that sly snake, Gaara, had knocked on my door. For some reason, he decided he wanted to take a walk with me of all people!

Huffing, I got dressed and met him outside the mansion doors. He stood facing away from me with his hands down by his sides. He seemed to really enjoy the quiet. No one else appeared to be awake, although I knew that wasn't true. This was a ninja village, people were probably milling about at this very moment, preparing for their missions.

Still, it was so quiet I wanted to sit here for a while and watch him enjoy it. I leaned against the wall, doing just that, when he moved suddenly, looking back at me with the light from the fading moon brightening his face. "You came."

I folded my arms, "No shit." I began walking over to him, both strangely giddy and reasonably irritated. "you woke me up."

His lips shaped into Gaara's version of a smile, which, of course, was exactly one quarter of what everyone else thought was a smile. I rolled my eyes with a grin. "Where to?"

"Nowhere in particular." He said, all raspy. "Why? Is there somewhere you'd like to go?"

I wanted to hit him.

"No." I said, "Let's just walk."

And walk we did. It went on like this for minutes. The sky was beginning to lighten, desert birds chirping—or barking—whatever the hell they did. But it was nice, natural. We were so used to being alone now that it hardly registered as silence.

I looked over to Gaara and found him watching me. I flexed my eyebrows in an 'I caught you' gesture, but he didn't seem to care. It must have been the morning that did it to him.

"So," I said, "What do you do for fun, Gaara?"

Gaara blinked out of his stupor, running his fingers beneath his chin, "Well, I raise and collect cacti."

I burst out laughing, tears automatically springing into my eyes. I sniffled, pulling myself together, "No, really, what's your hobby?"

Again, serious as serious Gaara answered, "I raise and collect cacti."

I threw my head back this time, just to let him know how utterly hilarious that was. "What the hell? What are you? Someone's mom? That's so lame."

During this whole ordeal, Gaara stood facing me, his face unreadable, but his cheeks were pinkening. "I thought you'd wanted me to be honest."

"Yes, honest, not sad. You shouldn't need someone to teach you the difference, Gaara, but it seems like you do."

He sighed, "Are you this honest with all of your friends?"

I took a deep breath and gurgled air to get rid of the urge to laugh, "Indiscriminately. Besides, I thought you said my honesty was admirable."

"You remember our conversations?"

I was tempted to laugh, that's something I had said to him too, "Anyway, you always ask me that. What? Do you think I like to be especially mean to you, Gaara?"

By way of answer, his seafoam eyes, darted up to meet mine, unblinkingly.

 _Try again_ , "You may be extraordinary," I said, reaching up to curl a piece of hair behind his ear, his eyes followed mine anyway, "But you're not that special." I dropped my hand and swung away. "In all seriousness, that was a good answer, hilarious though it was. You should never be something you're not—not even for an attractive girl."

"So has no one ever not been themselves for you?" Gaara smirked.

I winked at him, "There's always an exception, Gaara. And, as you know, I am nothing if not exceptional."

He laughed, shaking his head at me.

"Why are you laughing?" I reached up and poked his right cheek, he stared at the offending digit, but didn't make a move to get rid of it, "I'm being serious."

"That's why its funny." Gaara responded, "I've only seen psychopaths love themselves the way you love you."

I took my hand away, still feeling his warm skin even as I pulled it behind my back.

"Psychopaths and the _successful,"_ I amended, "There's nothing wrong with self-love, Gaara."

"There is a limit."

"The _sun_ doesn't even come _close_ to my limit."

Even as he questioned me, he smiled.

"But…what if it becomes dangerous? What if you're hurting those closest to you?"

"If my loving me hurts you, then you don't love yourself enough or me for that matter." I shrugged, "And if I'm hurting my friends, just because I can, I don't really love me anyway. It would just be a façade, wouldn't it? A show of strength, where there is nothing but an empty, creaking hole. I would be nothing."

Gaara was quiet after that. How our little fun conversation turned into that? I don't know, but it didn't feel any different to me.

"Anyway," I began, watching Gaara ponder my words a little too long. "tell me about these lovely cacti of yours. Are they all ugly or just the big ones?"

"They're all beautiful." He said, eyes lighting up like a child with sweets. "There are many different types, each a little different than the last, but they're all my favorite."

I knew I'd regret it but, I asked, "Why is that?"

"The cactus plant is far superior to any other plant on earth."

I blinked at his child-like claim, tempted to giggle at the absurdity, but I held it back and let him talk. I was a little soft on happy Gaara, sue me.

"It has to survive in one of the harshest environments on earth and, yet, it produces the prettiest flower. It's prickly, but it's vibrant green and self-sustaining. It doesn't need a caretaker. It may be harsh on the outside, but on the inside…it's life saving. It's…perfect."

I nodded, taking it in as best as I could. The boy was in love…with a plant. "…Okay."

"I keep my own collection in a greenhouse not far from here." Gaara finally looked back over to me, still wide eyed from his confession. "Would you like to see it?"

"Your collection?"

He nodded, eagerly. Why were his eyes so damn shiny?

I shrugged again, not completely sure what to do. I guess I would take one for the team. "Lead on, captain."

As we walked, it began to come into focus. It was glass trimmed in white, and from here I could see there were cacti of all types. As Gaara almost ran to the door, I knew there was a cacti lesson coming on. And most of all, I knew I'd let him teach it.

/

We'd been there an hour when he began making tea. Cactus tea. He'd led me to a wooden bench that over looked a hill and sat a tray between us. It held two steaming cups of tea and rice cakes.

"Enjoy," he said, taking his cup immediately to his lips. He blew on it briefly before taking a sip and allowing his eyes to drift into the distance. I wasn't a big tea drinker, but…

I took up my glass, sniffed it, and brought it to my lips. The tea was steaming, but if I drank tea, I drank it boiling. I like the feeling of the fiery liquid running down my throat. I imagined it stoked a fire inside of me that reached all the way to the tips of my fingers. That's how my mother describes it anyway. She loves tea.

"Rinmaru?"

"Gaara?" I replied and sweetened my voice to a caress, "I like to say your name too."

His eyes darted away from me, cheeks pinkening. He was so easy sometimes.

I cackled wildly, the tea shaking in my hands.

Ignoring my words Gaara continued, "Tell me about you now. What do you do for fun?"

I glanced up at Gaara, took one long sip of tea, and placed my finished cup down on the tray. "I kill people."

Gaara just stared on at me with a straight face.

"For money. I kill people for money," I added in, tapping my temple. "I almost forgot that part."

"Rinmaru."

"What?" I said, "You don't need any details. We're only practicing here, Gaara. Miharu is the real target, not me."

Gaara just continued to stare as if by doing nothing I'd just give in. Ha! As if I would.

I glanced up with a smile, "I _am_ a ninja."

Nothing.

"That _is_ the truth."

No change.

"You do it too!"

He sipped his tea.

" _Fine_." I said poking him in the arm, "But _you_ are a child."

The corner of his mouth turned up, his eyes brightening with glorious victory. Mentally, I was kicking myself.

"What do you do for fun?" he asked again, "What are your hobbies?"

"Besides ninja related stuff?" I leaned back onto my hands, turning my nose up at the ceiling. "I go shopping, I guess. I love jewelry. All shiny things, really." I frowned, "I…train, this body doesn't come cheap, you know." Smiling, I gestured over myself. "Look at this shape. You think I keep this by _not_ training?"

His eyes briefly wandered over my body, before returning to my face. I felt a chill run up my arms, which I ignored. We were in the desert after all.

"I can sing. I play instruments." I shrugged, "But those I learned because of my grandfather." I smiled, "the old man thinks I'm a professional."

"The feudal lord?"

I nodded.

"And your parents?" he asked, "What are they like?"

I laughed, rolling my eyes as my mother's cute frown and my father's ridiculous smile popped into my head. "Silly, ridiculous…in love."

"Still?"

"They married young, much to my aunt's annoyance. My father is her brother. She thought she would marry first, but…some men find her…intimidating." I leaned forward. "She's gorgeous, of course, but she's no nobleborn. She doesn't have the nack for making strangers love her without any real reason—"

"The way you do." Gaara commented, he sounded far away just then. I could barely feel him in front of me, and yet his voice I could feel it in my head almost.

I shrugged, "My mother, despite being born noble, doesn't have it either. In fact, she was pretty much completely despised by everyone she met because of her temper.

She's a dragon, my mother. She does as she pleases and will shout if the need seizes her. She has no talent for playacting."

"Where did you get yours from?" Gaara asked. "Your 'talent'?"

"No one. I guess…I just taught myself. It was easy for me to take pieces, parts of me, and put them on display or hide them, when needed. Both of my parents are horrible at that." I continued. "my father is pure sunshine. Innocent and curious. He swears he saw mother once—she slapped him upon their first meeting—and he knew he loved her. This fiery noblewoman slapping a ninja from the _Mist_ Village? Oh, he'd be a fool to let her go. And my mother, she hated to admit it, but it was easy for her to love him…so easy."

"I see." Gaara replied.

I touched the pendant at the base of my neck, "Love is like that sometimes. Sometimes it comes easy." I stretched, "It'll be that way for you too, one day. You'll be so stupid with it, you won't know what to do with yourself and you can thank me afterwards."

He was silent in moment before speaking again, "Have you ever been in love, Rinmaru?"

I blinked, I felt that strange shift again, that chill, "No. Never. In fact, I don't believe I can fall in love."

Gaara frowned. Look he gave me was strange, it made me want to look away. It almost looked—I shook my head. It was time to end our little practice session. It was time to go. "Love is for good people. Not the wicked."

"Do you believe that?" he asked, a weird tone in his voice. I was seized with the sudden urge to run away, but…I know I couldn't. There was no reason to.

"You're starting to forget, Gaara." I leaned toward him, erasing the space between us so that our noses were a breath apart. "I am not a good person."

* * *

Author's Note: Hey! I wondered if anyone noticed, but I've been using songs for chapter title ideas. This one I took from _Beauty and the Beast._ We all know who the beast is, I shouldn't have to say it. * _cough*_ Rinmaru _*cough*_

The two are growing closer. Even Miharu has noticed it. What will happen now?

Anyway, we're winding down. This is the eighth chapter, so we should have three to four chapters left (not counting the epilogue(s)). I'll put out the ninth at the beginning of September or the end of August, we'll see. That one will be a monster, twenty or so pages.

See you then!


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